Tues. Dec. 5, 2017: And We’re Definitely in Mercury Retrograde

Tuesday, December 5, 2017
Waning Moon
Uranus Retrograde
Mercury Retrograde

Yeah, Mercury’s Retrograde — AGAIN, and it looks like it’ll be a rough one.

Hop over to the GDR site for the November wrap-up.

Hop on over to the Kemmyrk site for some background on today, one of my favorite days, St. Nicholas Day.

I’m still recovering from the events of Friday and the car. I contacted my regular garage, and they’re putting together an estimate for me. I contacted a friend who knows the best places to get tires around here, and he gave me some suggestions.

Got a bunch of admin stuff done Friday, and then I went off to Nirvana in Barnstable to meet a friend for coffee. And was stood up. I had to dig deep — I don’t like that type of disrespect, and it’s a pattern between this individual and me.

But instead of sitting there feeling angry and hurt, I acknowledged I was both of those things, and I sat and enjoyed my mocha latte for a half hour. It was quiet, it was pretty, it was a nice atmosphere. Why shouldn’t I enjoy myself, since I was there? So I did.

Then, I went next door to Barnstable Market, and I found the plum pudding, Dresden stollen, and leibkuchen I wanted for the holidays.

I let the person know I’d waited for a half hour and then left. I didn’t hear anything until mid-morning on Saturday (since I know this person is intimately connected to mobile devices at all times, that didn’t help my attitude). She claimed she’d sent me an email, because a crisis at work came up, and she hopes to reschedule. Well, I never got it (Mercury Retrograde), and it is what it is. These things happen, and things get mixed up. Later in the afternoon, she forwarded the missing email — it had never left the Inbox. If she’s serious, she can contact me after the holidays.

This is huge progress for me, acting like a grown-up in this situation. I’m not striking out in anger. I’m also not committing to putting myself into a situation again that’s bad for me. I’m being polite, and giving the benefit of the doubt to a point, adding it to the balance sheet.

It builds on removing myself from a work relationship that had been toxic last year, where I’d done the equivalent of $150,000 of pro bono work over several years for an organization that repeatedly refused my professional suggestions because they were “too New York” (um, no, they’re “professional” which is why they WORK in New York) and then turned around and paid someone else to do the exact same thing I’d been doing for free. Truly a case of “why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?” And yet, without that client, my life contains much less stress and unhappiness, although there are aspects of the work with them that I miss.

But aren’t balance sheets in relationships always uneven? To a point, yes. Relationships, friendships, the like, all go through cycles where one party tends to do more of the heavy lifting. If and when it gets out of balance, that’s when the relationship has to be reassessed. Either there are ways to get it back in balance, or it needs to end. And only the individuals within the relationship understand its unique balance.

In January of 2016, my promise to myself was “reciprocity” — because I feel that in this area of the country, most interactions lack reciprocity. One party demands everything and gives nothing in return. In New York, believe it or not, there was far more reciprocity, especially among professionals. Cape Cod is the epitome of how and why the “Trickle Down” fantasy the GOP keeps pushing DOESN’T WORK. It doesn’t let people break the cycle of poverty (on either financial or emotional levels), and, after awhile, people start living a “gimme” life. What the GOP claims is created by social services (such as SNAP and Medicare) — laziness, refusal to work, grabbiness, expecting handouts — is actually CREATED by THEIR policies when they remove those safety nets. But, because they’re being paid off to push the policies, they don’t care.

It’s been hard work these last two years to put the Reciprocity Model into action in my life. I often fail. But I’m more aware of it now, I’m better at saying “no” upfront when an unequal demand is made, or, once I realize it’s getting way out of whack, trying to rebalance and/or make the decision that is best for ME and walk away.

There’s definitely more work to do, but I’m making progress. Not the least of that progress is not letting the hurts and anger fester and dwell on them, rather than letting go and moving on. I remember, and I use what I’ve learned to make better choices.

Anyway, Saturday was about finishing up both a review and an article. I also raked another 270 gallons of leaves — still in the front. I haven’t made any progress anywhere else yet! Got a bit of decorating done, but there’s still so much more to do.

Thought about SERENE AND DETERMINED, but didn’t get anything written on it. I tried to make up for it yesterday and today. I don’t know why I’ve had such a difficult time getting the play on paper this year.

Thought about a few other things I want to create next year — long-term business plans.

I sent out a bunch of questionnaires to potential web hosts. My current web host 1&1, did nothing but insult me and give me the runaround instead of taking 15 minutes to answer my questions. I need a new web host!

Behind on TRACKING MEDUSA, too. Behind on “Miss Winston Apologizes” — release date moved back on that. Although the new cover is pretty cool.

My mom’s foot is taking a long time to heal. We still have a lot of post-op care.

Outlined two new ideas. Don’t know when I’ll get a chance to work on them, but the premises intrigue me.

Over the past month, my mom and I have read all of Jenn McKinlay’s Hat Shop Mysteries and her Cupcake Bakery Mysteries. They’re fun, and I like the way she grows the character relationships from book to book, so they’re all of a piece. That’s what I’m trying to do in the Nautical Namaste and the Picaroon Island mysteries.

Tessa loves the Christmas Tree. She’s very gentle with it, but she loves to spend time under it — especially when it’s lit.

Session with the client went well yesterday. Hopefully today will also be great, and forward progress.

A lot of deal with this week. During Mercury Retrograde. I’d rather hide in my bed, but I guess that’s not an option!

 

Mon. April 29, 2013: Terrific Weekend and Hitting the Ground Running

IMG_1015

Monday, April 29, 2013
Waning Moon
Saturn Retrograde
Cloudy and cool

QUITE the weekend!

Friday was about the final prep for the conference, including re-assembling the inspiration board for TRACKING MEDUSA.

I attended the Arbor Day ceremony, which was a tree planting in memory of one friend’s mother/another friend’s grandmother. It was great fun, and the photos, etc. will be up on the Beautification Blog either today or tomorrow.

Worked on Chapter 14 of the book, worked with students, put everything together for Saturday. Wrote a review, worked on finishing up stuff for the judging.

Did not sleep well Friday night, and had to get up at 5 AM Saturday. Yoga, meditation, walking the property, breakfast, and then it was into the car and up to Burlington, MA for the NECRWA Let Your Imagination Take Flight Conference.

It was a lot of fun. I went to a presentation on making historical characters come alive, I sat outside (It was a gorgeous day) and re-arranged my presentation. We had a good group, and I had stuff to hand out, which is always great — tipsheets and the like. It was a fun, lively presentation — and, of course, they had to write! But people kept coming up to me the rest of the day to tell me how much they enjoyed it.

Corinna Lawson, with whom I’m Twitter pals, and who I met at the Write Angles Conference was there, and we headed off to lunch together. The lunch was a lot of fun, lively conversation at the tables, and Caroline Linden as the speaker.

After lunch, I attended Donna Alwood’s presentation on staying sane in the fluctuations of the business, which got me thinking about a lot of things, and Ella Drake’s presentation on formatting. I went to the signing (I hadn’t signed up to sign), and by then, I was worn out, so I headed back.

Managed to get back while it was still light and relax with a glass of wine on the deck. Love the longer daylight hours!

I certainly slept well Saturday night.

Sunday, I was up early, morning routine, newspapers, off to the garden stores. We got some pansies and marigolds and things for the front urn, and black gloss rustoleum paint for the plant stand I bought a few years ago that needed a touch-up. Managed to get the plants in and the rack painted before jumping in the shower and leaving for yoga.

The Unitarian Church in Barnstable hosted a community yoga day. I went for the first session, Hatha Yoga, which was fun. The teacher’s style was very different than the teachers I usually study with, but I enjoyed it.

The plan was to then go to Nirvana, get some work done, and go back for meditation. Unfortunately, it was lively and noisy at Nirvana, and I couldn’t concentrate, so I went home and sat on the deck working instead.

Made it back for meditation, which was great — using singing bowls and something called “an ocean drum”.

Came home, cooked a great dinner, and relaxed in the evening.

It was a really good weekend.

However, I didn’t do a lot of the traditional work I need to do, so today, I have to hit the ground running, especially on the book, working with editing clients, getting some admin done, and winding up stuff for the contest and Arbor Day.

So I better get going!

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Devon