Wednesday, April 19, 2009

Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Dark Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Jupiter Retrograde
Uranus Retrograde
Humid and hot

I puttered around and got work done in the morning, got the grocery shopping done, took care of some other business. Then, I headed off to CT for some site work in the afternoon, and also managed to get some other client work done and out. I cooked, for the first time in a few days, which was a nice change. When I’m stressed out, I lose my appetite, and the computer situation’s been stressing me out so much I haven’t been eating properly, pretty much only one meal a day. So, I’m trying to get back on track.

Meditation group was interesting — only one of the same people from my last session, but two other people who come pretty regularly and two new people. They said that last week it was packed — about twenty people — which must have been an interesting experience. Of the new people, one was really open to the experience and one was not. The latter kept trying to force confrontation, and no one engaged, so she was left spinning in her own bile. Anyway, I got a lot out of it, and, although it will probably be about two weeks again before I can go back, I’d like to keep working with this particular group. The structure of the meditation works well for me, and I find the interpersonal dynamics interesting without feeling as though I need to engage with anyone who’s trying to make it all about them or push negativity onto anyone else. The negativity is spewed and then dissipates; the rest of us aren’t touched by it, and the spewer is left feeling rather confused at not getting the desired reaction. It’s quite an unusual scenario. In any group, everyone plays a role, and my role in this group has developed into the one who makes the comment that gets everyone to laugh when the mood needs to shift, without being negative. Positive wit rather than negative humor.

I definitely have some philosophical questions that are formulating, which I will bring up in the coming weeks, but I want to see how the natural dynamic comes into play.

More preparations for Prague. I find Czech history very confusing, but I’m trying to wade through these books anyway. Language-wise, I’m not putting in the time and picking it up as quickly as I’d like — I have to get back to that again when the moon turns and it’s easier to begin a new project. Granted, there’s very little time for this project, but hopefully, I can use the turn of the moon phase as a catalyst to get me back on track. I also have to call the exchange bureau to find out when I can pick up my currency.

Difficult morning’s writing. I have to look up a few things for “Amends” and I forgot what that arched trellis thing one puts in a garden and lets vines and roses, etc. grow over is called. I want to say “arbor”, but I’m not sure that’s correct.

“Amends is developing nicely; I’m very happy with it. It’s just that now I have to stop and look up a few things before I can continue. But it feels good to be in a steady writing rhythm again.

I’m weary, and I’m tired of worrying, every time I turn the computer on and off, that everything will go kaplooey. But, until I have a sustained period of time where the computer works well, that’s the way it’s going to be.

Elsa’s been a little under the weather for the past few days again, and I was worried about her. But I changed something dietary yesterday, and it’s made a big difference. She perked up within an hour, and has been engaged and playful ever since. Well, she is my “special needs” cat.

Back to the page. I want to get a good day’s writing in today. I’m out of the office for most of the day tomorrow, on an adventure, so I have to get a lot done today.


Published in: on August 19, 2009 at 8:25 am  Comments (7)  
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