Thurs. Nov. 14, 2019: Writing, Changes, Planning

Thursday, November 14, 2019
Waning Moon
Neptune Retrograde
Uranus Retrograde
Mercury Retrograde
Partly cloudy and cold

We have a bit of snow Tuesday night. Just a dusting. Charlotte was fascinated by the snowflakes. Willa ran away. Tessa was unimpressed.

Hop on over to Gratitude and Growth, to see the latest in the garden.

Hop on over to the Goals, Dreams, and Resolutions site, where I’ve put up the questions for 2020. The approach is a little different this year. I hope you enjoy them, and that they are helpful as you figure out how to start the New Year — and the new decade. They will also live permanently on this page.

Impeachment hearings started yesterday. About damn time.

Had a good editing session in the morning yesterday. Then went on-site with a client. Remote Chat was fun, as it always is.

I’m trying to be smarter about using LinkedIn, but every time I sign in, I remember why I hate it so much. It wants to limit me.

I resent being forced to be on both LinkedIn and GoodReads. They don’t serve me. They get in my way.

I’m frustrated with A2 because they won’t fix a problem on the Fearless Ink site. Or do anything about the hacking and the threats I’ve been receiving. I need to move hosts. Which probably means rebuilding everything from scratch when I do so. SiteGround, so far, is the top contender. They’re pricier than A2, but it looks like they actually offer support when something goes wrong. And security. A2 used to offer both. Now, they just don’t give a damn.

Stopped at the store on my way home. Wednesday night has evolved into pizza night here, so that was fun.

Charlotte and Willa race to greet me when I come home. It’s so cute. Tessa was out and about a bit, but there’s still a lot of tension between her and the other two. We need to do some more work. I don’t believe that Feliway Diffuser has done a damn thing. Glad I got it on sale.

The landlord arranged for the septic tank to be pumped on Tuesday. Later in the week, he’s coming over with he heating guy to see about replacing the furnace. That means, this weekend, I have to do a serious purge of the basement around the bulkhead doors, because that’s how the new furnace will have to come in, and the old one will have to go out. That throws a monkey wrench in my weekend, but I’m grateful that he’s willing to replace it when the furnace people suggest it, rather than waiting until it breaks down in the middle of a blizzard.

Writing and editing sessions this morning, then off to the library for a bit. Back home for more writing, some raking, some basement purging. Writing session was okay; editing session was excellent.

I finished the book for review, and sent off the review to the editor. Told her I’m ready for the next one.

I plan to read my friend’s book this weekend, too. I finally feel I earned it!

 

Tues. Oct. 15: Cat Adjustments Continue During the Storm

Tuesday, October 15, 2019
Waning Moon
Neptune Retrograde
Uranus Retrograde

Hop on over to A Biblio Paradise for this month’s Reader Expansion Challenge. I read a delightful anthology called HAUNTED NIGHTS.

The bulk of the weekend was devoted to cat socialization. When you think it’s only been a bit over a week, they’re doing very well. There are still some hissy-spitties and growlies, but, overall, they are adjusting.

The weather was so dreadful on Friday that I never left the house. I read, worked with the cats, wrote. I shouldn’t be working on GAMBIT COLONY right now, but that’s my stress release piece, so I am.

Friday’s phone interview with a potential client did not go well. Again, it’s that whole unpaid labor as a requirement of the hiring process. I’m not working for you for free. I am not giving up billable hours because you’re incapable of reading my portfolio and analyzing my writing skills. That is a lack of skill on YOUR part, not mine. Yesterday, I withdrew from consideration.

I need to follow up with another potential client this week. I knew there was a busy period coming, but I can’t wait any longer, or there won’t be room in the schedule. I need to know whether or not we’re moving forward.

Saturday morning, I ran some errands, even though it was still raining. None of the places I went to has the filter I need for the furnace. I need to get my hands on one before they come to do maintenance on Friday. My landlord complains if they charge him for the filter, saying they charge too much. Um, why is this my problem? It’s not like the rent doesn’t cover it. Especially with the increase.

We had a fire in the fireplace Saturday afternoon. Willa wasn’t sure about it, which is funny, because Willa is The Little Adventurer. Charlotte was fascinated. She sat at a safe distance, but where she could watch it. Tessa’s been around fireplaces since she was a kitten, so she was nonchalant about it all. It was pretty funny.

Sunday morning, they had me up at 4 AM, because they were hissing and growling and chasing each other around the house. Well, because they all three wanted to be in my bedroom and THEN the hissing, growling, and running around the house started.

They settled down once they had breakfast, but I was up. Once I’m up, I’m up.

The sun was out, so I put the exterior decorations back up. I’ll add in the lights this weekend or so. I had to drive to Brewster to pick something up. The pickup went well, although the person doing the handoff made me feel uncomfortable.

Stopped in Dennis for some overpriced but delicious baked goods. But it was a little too much sugar for one day.

Read the newest Donna Leon, UNTO US A SON IS GIVEN, which was excellent. I love that series. Read a different mystery by a different author where I like the characters, but there’s a lack of research in some of the aspects that really bothers me. So I always have mixed feelings when I read one of the books.

Up early on Monday. The cats tried to get me up at 4 AM again, but I closed the door, keeping Tessa in the bedroom with me and the other two out. Then, of course, they all worked to try and get the door open, but I managed to stay in bed until 5:30, which is a reasonable time to get up.

I did not take the holiday. I went in to do some work onsite with a client, hoping for a quiet day. No meditation group. Went in search of the furnace filter, and then make chicken pot pie for dinner. I’m getting good at making chicken pot pie from scratch.

Had a good follow-up from Thursday’s conversation, and am moving forward on that. Also got my edits/proofs from my editor at Llewllyn for the piece for 2021. Will turn those around this week.

Today, I’m onsite with a client most of the day, and then off to the library for a bit. Along with writing, revisions, and final galleys.

The whole situation with Syria and the Kurds is disgusting. The woman who was raped and then stoned to death — unacceptable. Sending our troops to Saudi Arabia — not acceptable. The Narcissistic Sociopath dances with glee as people are slaughtered, and he makes a personal profit. The GOP, who could stop him, won’t. Not out of fear, but out of greed. Add to that the video of the Sociopath killing people who disagree with him that’s running at his resort? He should be in front of the Hague, and then locked away until he rots. It will take decades to repair what he’s destroyed. Which is, of course, what he was put in there to do in the first place. Destroy. Every single person who enables and votes for him is complicit. And must be defeated. This is what the GOP has worked toward since Reagan was in office. Greed and apathy made it possible.

One word at a time. That’s all I can do.

 

Published in: on October 15, 2019 at 5:59 am  Comments Off on Tues. Oct. 15: Cat Adjustments Continue During the Storm  
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Thurs. Sept. 12, 2019: Trying to Get Back on Track

Thursday, Sept. 12, 2019
Waxing Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Saturn Retrograde
Neptune Retrograde
Uranus Retrograde
Monsoon-like rains

Sorry this is late, but the weather’s thrown a monkey wrench into things this morning. Tomorrow’s post will be late, too, because I have a morning meeting.

Hop on over to Gratitude and Growth, for the latest on the garden. And if you didn’t see Monday’s post about Flexibility on the GDR site, it’s here. I’m working on the questions for 2020, and they will be posted soon.

It’s been a tough week. We miss Lucy terribly. Tessa steps up, trying to take care of everyone in the household, but she misses Lucy, too.

One of my clients was at a luncheon with the head of Bide-A-Wee, where I adopted several of my cats when I lived in NYC. She got us in touch, and Leslie looks forward to helping me find the next member of our feline family when we’re ready. It means going to NY, but I’m established with Bide-A-Wee, and they don’t automatically mark every cat as “must be only pet” as they do here.

We are, of course, open to a cat coming to us from another source, but it’s nice to know we have options.

The writing has been a struggle. I’m close to the end of this draft of GRAVE REACH and am pushing through. I’m working slowly but steadily on ELLA BY THE BAY. I’m working slowly and not quite as steadily on “Pier-less Crime”. I’ve also been playing with another idea that’s pulled at me and pulled at me.

I have a meeting early tomorrow morning. I like what I know of the company, but wasn’t thrilled with the interactions with the person I’ll be talking to tomorrow. We’ll see. I’m getting jaded. Most of these appointments are a complete waste of time. They’re about putting quotas into the statistics column, not actually finding the right person for an assignment or a marketing campaign. It’s a waste of time.

I’m getting more and more frustrated with A2 hosting. Now, when I have a question, I have to jump through multiple levels of “security” that has nothing to do with actual security and everything to do with asking me questions that are none of their damn business. Not to mention not actually reading my questions and answering them. Or providing any actual security against spam or anything else. Any random hacker can do whatever they want to my sites. But me? The owner who actually pays for them? Not so much.

A social media contact sent me the link to an article about how A2 has had security breaches since May of this year and isn’t fixing them. Yeah, that’s about when the problems started.

So I’m back to interviewing hosts again. I like what I see and hear so far with Site Ground. I want to have a more detailed conversation with them and maybe move everything over in a few months.

Working on LOIs and some more article pitches. Just so, so weary and sad.

But the Fearless Ink Twitter account I started to keep the business writing part of my social media life separate from everything else is working out well. And the Remote Chat yesterday was tons of fun, as usual. I feel very lucky with these colleagues.

Yesterday, September 11, was difficult, as it is every year. What was especially sickening was that the Narcissistic Sociopath tried to make it all about him, and those damn GOP hypocrites, talking about honor and remembrance, when just a few weeks ago, they tried to deny health care to those who came in and worked on the pile. I hope they all burn in hell for eternity.

I’m nearly finished reading Nancy Martin’s Blackbird Sisters mysteries. They are a lot of fun. I like her writing. It has a lot of energy, warmth, and humor in it. Plus, she’s a good plotter. It’s also fun to read books set in an area I know — Philadelphia and Bucks County.

I made chocolate chip cookies last night just because. Sometimes, you just need a chocolate chip cookie.

Back to the page.

Published in: on September 12, 2019 at 9:08 am  Comments Off on Thurs. Sept. 12, 2019: Trying to Get Back on Track  
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Wed. Aug. 28, 2019: Jury Duty

courtroom-898931_1920
image courtesy of pixabay.com

Wednesday, Aug. 28, 2019
Waning Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Saturn Retrograde
Neptune Retrograde
Uranus Retrograde

Jury duty starts today. Should be interesting.

If I’m tied up for the rest of the week and can’t post, have a lovely Labor Day weekend, and I’ll catch you on the other side next week!

Onsite with the client was fine. Then I had to race home for a meeting at the worst time possible for me during the day. More on that to follow.

It is what it is. It was their insistence that the meeting had to happen this week.

Early in the morning, I had to prep some food. A friend is passing through while I’ll be at court, and I want to make sure she can have something to eat when she stops by, even if I’m not there.

Yesterday sucked as a writing day, but I figured out how to start the play about Canaletto’s Sisters. I’ve got the opening scene mapped out in my head. It’ll be awhile before it gets on the page.

I definitely need a long weekend!

Published in: on August 28, 2019 at 5:34 am  Comments Off on Wed. Aug. 28, 2019: Jury Duty  
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Tues. Aug. 27, 2019: Trying To Get It All Done

Tuesday, August 27, 2019
Waning Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Saturn Retrograde
Neptune Retrograde
Uranus Retrograde

Busy weekend, but not very productive. I didn’t get anywhere near as much writing done as I needed to, especially not on GRAVE REACH. ELLA was in fits and starts. The main focus was on the article for Llewellyn, which I polished and sent off yesterday.

Saturday morning, friends stopped in on their way back from Nantucket. I had baked a chocolate sour cream cake on Friday night, and put on the brown sugar frosting on Saturday morning. It was supposed to be a 7-minute frosting, but took 27 minutes, as it does.

I read some of Elaine Viets’s books in her Dead End Job series and really enjoyed them. I finished reading a biography of Wendy Wasserstein, which got me thinking about my early days in professional NY theatre.

I did some research for a client meeting I have this afternoon. I did my paperwork for jury duty, and some other paperwork that needed attention. Got some bills paid and some errands run. Caught up on things like laundry. Cleaned the house.

Saturday was my last day on the antibiotic. I forgot that coming off an antibiotic is even more unpleasant than going on one, so I felt pretty miserable on Sunday and Monday.

Sunday evening, a friend came in on her way back to Nantucket. Brought us some fresh peaches. We’ll eat some and I’ll put the rest into a peach tart.

A lovely little black cat strolled through the yard, exploring. I’m not sure if she’s new to the neighborhood or lost. She was too shy to let me come close. I tried putting food out for her, but Che Guevera Chipmunk was all over it right away, so that didn’t work. I don’t want Che to think he gets room service. But I do want to find out if the little cat is lost and needs help finding her way home, or if she needs a home.

I made a Crockpot chicken tomatillo chili with cornbread, which was pretty good. Drove my friend back to the ferry.

Up early on Monday, writing and getting things done. Worked onsite with a client, prepped for today’s meeting, did some work at the library, went to meditation.

Have to run some errands this morning on my way in to the client’s. Then, I have to dash back to my home office for my conference with my potential client, then to the library to get some work done.

Tomorrow, I’m supposed to show up for jury duty, unless I hear otherwise by 5 PM tonight. Not sure how much I’ll be posting for the rest of the week.

I seriously doubt I’ll get put on a jury. They don’t want someone who is experienced in jury service to actually serve. Someone who might actually understand the way the law works and not be manipulated by lawyers. I’m sure I’ll get kicked out of contention tomorrow.

But it’s important to show up. Vote. Serve jury duty. It matters. It’s part of the responsibility of citizenship. I have no respect for people who try to wiggle out of jury duty. And I loathe people who don’t vote.

I’ll see what happens and think on my feet. All I can do is the best I can do.

 

Published in: on August 27, 2019 at 6:15 am  Comments Off on Tues. Aug. 27, 2019: Trying To Get It All Done  
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Wed. Aug. 21, 2019: When Healing is a Set Back/Done With Undervaluing

Wednesday, Aug. 21, 2019
Waning Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Saturn Retrograde
Neptune Retrograde
Uranus Retrograde
Someday it will stop being hot and humid

I had a bad night Monday into Tuesday, due to the infection in my hand. Scared me.

I went back to the doctor on Tuesday. She warned me that I would have a couple more bad days because the antibiotic is doing its job — but the infection will intensity for a bit before it improves.

In other words, type less.

I’m taking a break from Ink-Dipped Advice for a couple of weeks, and from the garden blog. I will still post here, but probably shorter posts.

My focus is on finishing my article and this draft of the book.

Nothing like being ready to walk out the door and the client needs you to create and send out an email blast for an event happening tomorrow that she forgot to mention. Yeah, it got done. On time. I wasn’t even leaving late. Because I’m just that good.

Prepping for a meeting with a potential client, I was told to “low ball” my rates. “Why would I do that?” I asked. I looked at the annual report. There’s plenty of money to pay writers. I know how much the previous person got.

“They don’t want to pay that much.”

Me: “Then I don’t want to work for them.”

I’m tired of being undervalued and undervaluing myself. You don’t want to pay my rates? Go ahead and hire someone cheaper, who doesn’t bring what I do to the table — a unique way to create voice, character, and story that works to engage an audience. Your loss. Not mine.

On site with a client today. I intend to enjoy the next two Lauren Dane books this weekend.

Back to the page (sometimes typing one-handed, sometimes hunt-and-peck).

Published in: on August 21, 2019 at 5:25 am  Comments Off on Wed. Aug. 21, 2019: When Healing is a Set Back/Done With Undervaluing  
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Tues. July 30, 2019: Trying to Keep Steady

Tuesday, July 30, 2019
Dark Moon
Jupiter Retrograde
Pluto Retrograde
Saturn Retrograde
Neptune Retrograde
Mercury Retrograde
Hot and humid

I did not have a particularly productive weekend. I wasn’t feeling well. Wrists, shoulders, hips, lower back, knees, all in pain. It was difficult to write.

I got a little bit done on ELLA. Not enough done on GRAVE REACH, and I feel like I’m losing the thread of it again. The deadline looms over me, so I have to get it done. Dig deeper and get it done.

But there was nothing in the tank this weekend.

I managed to get some grocery shopping done, and the recycling out to the dump. Painted some shells. Oiled a small table I picked up. Rearranged some stuff in the living room. Went through a box marked “trinkets” of things that were important to me about twenty years ago. At first, everything looked shabby and sad. Later, as I took each piece out and dealt with it, I decided what to keep and integrate, what to give away, what to toss.

Still have many, many more boxes to go and am running out of time.

We have a fisher on the property. I’m pretty welcoming to wildlife, but not fishers. They are vicious, and this one has an attitude. I don’t want him decimating our wildlife in the yard, or attacking Tessa. I’m not letting Tessa out, and she is angry with me. But I can’t risk her getting killed.

Fisher is part of the weasel family, and weasel is about stealth and paying close attention, so that is what I will do in the upcoming cycle.

While I try to figure out how to encourage him to move on.

Feeling very discouraged in general, and worn down.

But I managed to write the blurb for my friend’s book, which went off yesterday.

I’m still trying to get paid by that client. I thought this one was the exception to the local client rule around here. I was wrong. I’ll send another invoice on Friday, with the late fee. I partially blame myself — because of previous good experience with this client, I waived the partial fee up front. That won’t happen again.

Yesterday was the anniversary of my father’s death. He’s been out of my life longer than he was in it, but it’s still difficult. I did a “happy memories” ceremony for him last night.

The heat and humidity were high yesterday, and will be so again today. I don’t do well in that, either. Work with the client is off-the-charts stressful this week and next week, and then, hopefully, we can have some equilibrium. But yesterday went well, so I hope today and tomorrow will be the same.

All I can do is keep pushing through, and making adjustments as best I can, work toward making the necessary changes. But it’s difficult, disheartening, and slow.

Back to the page.

Published in: on July 30, 2019 at 6:23 am  Comments Off on Tues. July 30, 2019: Trying to Keep Steady  
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Wed. July 3, 2019: So Ready For The Weekend!

away-3024773_1920

(image by Tam66 courtesy of Pixabay)

Wednesday, July 3, 2019
Waxing Moon
Jupiter Retrograde
Pluto Retrograde
Saturn Retrograde
Neptune Retrograde

I am so ready for a long holiday weekend. Because we are a “destination” here, it’s been a nightmare to get anywhere all week.

I’m heading to the grocery store at 8 AM for a few things before I meet with my client.

Yesterday was fine. Invoiced two clients; got paid by one, and the other will pay me by the end of the week. Was onsite with a client and got a lot of stuff done. Did some remote work for another client.

I wasn’t going to send out any LOIs this week, but I saw an opportunity and didn’t want to miss it. Either it will work or it won’t.

Work on both ELLA and GRAVE REACH is going well. I’m also having a lot of fun with #31Prompts. I hope you’ll check it out and join in.

I don’t plan to blog until until Monday, when I’ll have another Upbeat Authors post.

I do, however, plan to write all weekend.

I’m avoiding the Occupant’s Authoritarian Debacle tomorrow and keeping things low key here.

Have a great weekend!

Published in: on July 3, 2019 at 5:26 am  Comments Off on Wed. July 3, 2019: So Ready For The Weekend!  
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Thurs. June 13, 2019: Writing, Garden, Rain

Thursday, June 13, 2019
Waxing Moon
Jupiter Retrograde
Pluto Retrograde
Saturn Retrograde
Raining and cool

Hop on over to Gratitude and Growth for the details about the garden and the mowing.

People are pretty sad around this area. The Bruins lost the Stanley Cup last night to St. Louis.

Yesterday, the guy came to mow, early in the morning. I’d let my neighbor know, so that he wouldn’t be rudely awakened (although he was probably up). In one hour, the guy did what usually took me several days. There’s a lot of relief in having this off my plate. I never found my mowing Zen, I hated the mowing part of having a yard. I struggled for years. This guy is nice, charges a price fair to both of us, and does a good job. If anyone decides to give me a hard time for not handling it myself, too bad. I’m not twenty any more. There are things I can’t physically do anymore, and things I don’t WANT to do. Mowing is both.

The lawn looks good (okay, I admit, I preferred it to look wild in the back), and now I can concentrate on the beds and plants, and putting down fertilizer to keep it green and healthy.

Client work onsite was fine. I’m prepping for next week’s big event. I’ll probably have to put in some extra hours in the next few days, remotely, but that’s fine.

Another client gave me the greenlight on the material I wrote, so now I’m getting it out to the press and up on event calendars.

Again, I got jerked around by the potential client in Boston. We’ve now had half a dozen conversations that I need advance notice to come up from the Cape to Boston. It is ignored. When I follow up on meetings they claim they want for confirmation, I get excuses.

So, it’s finally gotten through my thick skull that they’re not serious about hiring me. Somehow, they can use me as leverage against someone else. They’re stringing me along for whatever reason. But guess what? I’m not willing to be anyone’s second choice. And if so many red flags come up during our initial meetings, what would working with them be like?

I’m going to keep pursuing other opportunities. I’m going to keep keeping up with my other clients. I’m going to keep sending out LOIs and article pitches.

I’m disappointed, I’m a little angry, I’m insulted. But it’s best that I acknowledge those feelings, then drop them and move on.

I’m doing all kinds of research in Caribbean history. It’s technically for ELLA BY THE BAY, but some of it is useful in THE BALTHAZAAR TREASURE and DAVY JONES DHARMA.

ELLA BY THE BAY is going very well. I enjoy my daily writing session on it, in longhand. I like mixing elements of mystery, romance, and the character’s self-exploration.

GRAVE REACH is going more slowly, but it’s finding its way. I look forward to getting this draft to my editor. THE BALTHAZAAR TREASURE and DAVY JONES DHARMA both have new release dates, early next year, and I’m working on the revisions. The new track for both books is much better. I’d rather spend more time on the book than rush it and put out a lousy book.

I’m reading some material on Brighton Pier in preparation to write the next radio play. I’m looking forward to it. I might also contact the museum with some questions.

There’s still an awful lot that needs to be dealt with in the next few months, but I’m doing what I can each day to deal with it. Mercury in Retrograde for the bulk of July isn’t going to help.

Have to follow up today on an article I submitted a couple of weeks ago. It’s supposed to be paid on acceptance, and there hasn’t been any acknowledgement of it, much less acceptance, or payment. If this was the first time working with the publication, I would figure this is just the way they operate, but I’ve written and been paid for a half a dozen pieces over the years, so I don’t understand what’s going on now.

Will follow up on a couple of other things, too.

Fingers crossed, and then back to the page.

 

Published in: on June 13, 2019 at 9:08 am  Comments Off on Thurs. June 13, 2019: Writing, Garden, Rain  
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Fri. June 7, 2019: Trying to Get Back on Track

Friday, June 7, 2019
Waxing Moon
Jupiter Retrograde
Pluto Retrograde
Saturn Retrograde
Sunny and pleasant

It’s June, and I just switched from flannel sheets to cotton ones. That’s how cold it’s been around here.

I was up early yesterday morning. Got a bit of writing done, then headed out at 8:30 for a 9 AM meeting with a local client. It went well; after the meeting, I got the first of my part of it done; I have a press release to finish today and get off to them, and then a Skype meeting with another potential client in the afternoon.

Took my mother to her medical appointment. It went reasonably well, but there’s still care to be done on the leg. Ran some errands on the way home, and then, using some new garden equipment, did some yard work. Tackled the rest of the front bed, and cleaned out a lot of the Sleeping Beauty look on the side, and pruned the pretty blooming tree. I decided to hire in someone to mow, but so far, the companies are nasty and sexist and condescending. Why would I pay money to someone who treats me like that? I wish I could find something like Rent-A-Husband, or a woman-run business.

Went to bed ridiculously early last night and finally slept through the night. I’m suffering from severe stress & exhaustion from the events of the past few months, and it’s taking its toll. If I don’t take care of it now, my health will break down indefinitely.

Errands this morning, client work out, prepping for a meeting, and then more yard work. Because there’s always more damn yard work. I’m trying to get the damn weed whacker fixed, so I can actually use it to whack weeds. It works for about two minutes, and then needs adjustment again. I’m so sick of nothing damn working.

I want my weekend to be about writing, especially about GRAVE REACH, but there will, no doubt, be lots of yard work, too.

The Bloomberg article the other day about it being a “myth” that most people can’t afford an unexpected expense was so condescending and removed from reality I wanted to vomit. I expect no less from them — they are, after all, a business publication, and dedicated to screwing the workers while applauding useless executives who profit from those who actually do the work.

I want some time off, with no pressure and no demands on me. I am desperate for it.

Don’t see that happening any time soon.

But I am always happy to go back to the page.

And tomorrow, I’m going to my local library’s big fundraiser (not the library where I used to work, but the library where I spend part of my day three to four times a week). I’m looking forward to it. I use the library so often; I want to support them.

Have a great weekend!

 

Published in: on June 7, 2019 at 9:29 am  Comments Off on Fri. June 7, 2019: Trying to Get Back on Track  
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Tues. June 4, 2019: Trying to Put One Foot in Front of the Other

Tuesday, June 4, 2019
Waxing Moon
Jupiter Retrograde
Pluto Retrograde
Saturn Retrograde

It’s been a difficult few weeks. There’s plenty I can’t talk about right now in a public venue.

The additional pressure has certainly slowed down the writing. That’s negative not only because it puts a dent in earnings — which I can’t have right now — but also because when I don’t write enough each day, it throws my day out of balance. I have deadlines looming, and even though I’m working as hard as I can, I don’t know what to do.

The red flags just keep coming with that potential client out of Boston. They made demands; I met them; now I’ve heard nothing. Not even common courtesy. Yet I’m sure, should they want to take the next step, that they will, once again, expect me to drop everything the second they snap their fingers. Not happening. IF and WHEN they are paying me for my time and my skills, that’s when they get to make such demands. Otherwise, they have to negotiate. Current clients take priority over maybe someday clients.

On a happy note, I heard from Radio Theatre Project that they like “Intrigue on the Aurora Nightingale” and want to take a look at the play set on Brighton Pier for their October slot. Of course, I have to write the play set on Brighton Pier — but at least I managed to dig up one research book, out of the Boston library.

Saturday, I ran errands. Tried to get the house back to rights after all the rearranging for the fridge switch out. Cut back and dug out one of the front beds in the yard, and moved some hostas.

I’m exhausted and overwhelmed and discouraged.

Was up, as usual, half the night fretting Saturday night into Sunday. Got some work done on ELLA both days. Not enough on GRAVE REACH. Got the first chapter of ELLA into the computer (which means I’m working on the first and second drafts together of that book).

Did four loads of laundry on Sunday. It kept threatening to rain; I wasn’t sure if I should try to get something done in the yard, but it being Sunday, I wanted to make sure it was something quiet. I managed to get the fertilizer down on the terraced back area.

Started reading Amanda Flower‘s Magical Bookshop mysteries, which are quite good.

A former client contacted me, wondering if we could get together this week so I could write a press release. Hopefully, we can work out the day and time. I like working with them, and it would be fun to do something again.

Was onsite with a client yesterday, and will be today and tomorrow. More pitches and LOIs going out this week.

There was a great piece by a job search advocate (who even knew those existed?) about how badly so-called “human services” professionals treat the people they interview — things like not respecting the interviewee’s time, asking questions that don’t matter to the job, not giving enough or correct information about the job, and not giving a final answer, even if it’s a rejection. Totally agree. It’s not true that there aren’t enough qualified candidates for the jobs — it’s that the people doing the interviews aren’t finding the right matches. It’s especially true when everything is done online and the application is only sent through an algorithm. Especially for a job that requires creativity, the best candidate cannot fit into the boxes. The whole point of finding the right creative fit is someone who DOESN’T fit into boxes, not someone who lies to make it seem like a good fit.

Trying to break out of this loop of self-defeating, negative interior monologue telling me I’m worthless and useless and untalented and a failure. Intellectually, I know it’s not true, but emotionally, that’s what I feel, and I’m frustrated and disheartened and feel stuck, and like I can’t break the cycle. I have to, and I have to do it quickly, but I don’t know how.

It doesn’t help that the economy is about to crash, either, thanks to the Narcissistic Sociopath Grifter and his enablers.

I am desperate for a break of a few days with NO demands on me, and I don’t know when that will happen.

In the meantime, I’m dealing with whatever’s in front of me in the moment. Which isn’t a good solution, but it’s all I’ve got for the moment.

Published in: on June 4, 2019 at 5:28 am  Comments Off on Tues. June 4, 2019: Trying to Put One Foot in Front of the Other  
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Tues. April 2, 2019: Regaining Equilibrium & Grabbing Opportunities

Tuesday, April 2, 2019
Waning Moon

I hope everyone had a good weekend.

Mine was all over the place. The drama surrounding what should have been something simple intensified, and I’m fed up. In addition to being hurt and frustrated because I said if these particular actions were taken, these would be the results, and I would be the one who had to pay for it both financially and emotionally. That was ignored, I was hit with consequences for something that was not an action of MINE, and now I’m supposed to jump through more hoops to fix it, instead of the person who caused the issue in the first place. No. Just no.

Human beings make mistakes. It happens.

When I make a mistake, I apologize, first and foremost. Then I take actions to correct the mistake. Then I work to rebuild any trust that was broken because of the mistake. Especially the latter takes time, and isn’t always successful. But I make the effort.

Yet in this situation, when the other party made a mistake that affected me in more than one area of my life — I had to fight to get an acknowledgement and then a half-hearted apology. And then I was told the hoops I had to jump through to get it fixed with a third party– again, this was NOT my mistake — which I had told the person who made the mistake wouldn’t work in the first place, because I actually have worked in this field and know the manipulations. As I predicted, it did not work, I was badly treated, shamed, and mansplained to. The situation is still not resolved. We are now in Day 5 of something that shouldn’t have happened in the first place, and could have been fixed in FIVE MINUTES.

Even if it is, any future interactions will be tainted. What used to be in the life balance column is now in the life stressor column.

I don’t need that, especially not this month, when things are stretched to the max anyway.

In addition to the whole situation making me angry, I am so, so hurt. This was someone I trusted.

But now I know better.

And I’ve lost a sanctuary I deeply value. Which is painful.

So, basically, most of the weekend was spent in emotional pain management, trying to heal, and, every time I took a step to try to resolve the situation, getting another metaphorical slap in the face.

I didn’t get a lot of writing done, although I got some plotting, and I’m back working on GRAVE REACH this week. At least I can relate to Lesley’s pain and sense of betrayal. I’ll find a way to funnel it into the work.

I read my friend Arlene Kay’s DEATH BY DOG SHOW, which was really fun. Made me laugh a lot.

I worked on the books for review. I worked on contest entries. I got quite a bit done on the contest entries.

I started working in the yard. Saturday was so beautiful. I got the terraced area in the back raked out. I didn’t get as far as the border bed on the terraced area, but I got the rest of the beds raked out, did some pruning and cutting back. Got rid of a lot of bindweed that’s been creeping around. And some of the roses are taking over, so I’m going to have to do some serious hacking back in the next few weeks.

Worked on the proofs for the almanac. They went out yesterday morning.

Was with a client on Monday, and will be so today. Wednesday, Thursday, and maybe into Friday, I have an adventure. I’ll be able to share some of the details next week. And then I go into another intense weekend of writing and, next Saturday, going to see my radio play performed live in Boston.

My entire intent on Monday was to keep my head down. I don’t like April Fool’s Day. I don’t like that people feel liberated to be cruel — although, since the 2016 election, they feel that every day, and, especially around here, regularly act on it.

Onward.

 

Published in: on April 2, 2019 at 5:26 am  Comments Off on Tues. April 2, 2019: Regaining Equilibrium & Grabbing Opportunities  
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Wed. March 27, 2019: Gearing Up for the Right Kind of Busy

Wednesday, March 27, 2019
Waning Moon
Mercury Retrograde

No post today on Ink-Dipped Advice.

I had the worst headache on Monday. Meditation helped, but it kept threatening on Tuesday.

I heard from the production in Florida that the night went well and the audience loved the play. They said there was “one big acting gaffe” that they’d fix in post-production before they uploaded the audio file. I’m not sure what that means, but I have to trust them to do their thing.

Production-wise, my attention is now focused on the piece that runs in Boston the first two weekends in April.

Worked on books for review Monday night and Tuesday. Did a little writing Tuesday morning and some editing.

A potential client wanted to have a phone conversation yesterday or today, but the only available times where when I was onsite, and I felt that was inappropriate, so I requested to set it, at their convenience, Thursday or Friday. She was happy to do so. I’m looking forward to it, tomorrow morning, but it means tomorrow’s post will go up late!

Got the proofs from my editor from the almanac articles. She’s asked for a couple of tweaks. No problem. I’ll work on them in the next few days, and turn them around.

Client work onsite yesterday, and then other writing and review work, to try to keep on top of deadlines.

Tired. Client work today. Then, if the weather still holds, maybe some yard work. It might get as high as 70 degrees this weekend, which means definite yard work.

But for now, it’s back to the page. And waiting to hear what’s going on between the WGA-ATA conflict.

 

Published in: on March 27, 2019 at 6:24 am  Comments Off on Wed. March 27, 2019: Gearing Up for the Right Kind of Busy  
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