Mon. Sept. 6, 2021: Enjoying the Long Weekend

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I’m taking the Labor Day holiday and enjoying it. I hope you are, too!

We’ll have a good catch-up tomorrow!

Published in: on September 6, 2021 at 7:36 am  Comments Off on Mon. Sept. 6, 2021: Enjoying the Long Weekend  

Fri. Sept. 3, 2021: Long Weekend

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My weekend starts today, and I have every intention of enjoying it!

Have a good one, and catch you on the other side!

Published in: on September 3, 2021 at 7:33 am  Comments (2)  

Fri. July 2, 2021: Feeling Like A Failure

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Friday, July 2, 2021

Waning Moon

Pluto Retrograde

Saturn Retrograde

Jupiter Retrograde

Neptune Retrograde

Rainy and mild

It’s been the week from hell.

The trip back down last Monday was fine. We got back into the house and started packing/purging, etc. Still so much to do, and it was overwhelming. The heat and humidity didn’t help. We worked in the empty house, with no fans, and only some screens (because the landlord had removed other screens to sand/paint the windows).

The dumpster arrived in the afternoon, a beautiful thing.

Packed mostly boxes that had to go to storage on Tuesday. Wound up renting an additional storage unit for the stuff we want to come back down for in the autumn; hopefully, we can clean that unit out by October, and only carry the additional cost for a few months.

Tuesday was another hot/humid day. Did dump runs, more donations, more packing, more purging, started to organize the dumpster. The guys I hired arrived at 1, loaded up the two sets of things I’d sorted, we took them over to storage. The whole thing took only an hour and a half. They were great.

Came back, did more packing/purging/dumpster stuff. It’s still overwhelming.

Wednesday morning, our neighbors came over and helped pack the dumpster and clean out the garage. I need another dumpster. I couldn’t get it all done.

I called the landlord. He was, understandably, upset. But screaming at me that he could have rented that house next week for $10,000 was simply unrealistic. First of all, we’ve lived in it for 10 years. It needs more work than could be done over the holiday weekend. Especially considering all the stuff he never got around to doing that was promised over the past 10 years. Second, with those old bathrooms from Bathfitters and Formica counters in the kitchen, old fridge on its last legs – people are not going to pay top dollar for that. Yes, he could rent per week for several thousand dollars; but, even if we were out of the house on the 30th, it wouldn’t be by next week.

He also yanked out the bush that was Che Guevara Chipmunk’s home.

On the one hand, he’s angry that the house isn’t ready, and he can’t make weekly rental fees (something he used to say he didn’t want). On the other hand, he keeps saying how he can’t find anyone to hire, and has to do the work himself. He’s been working on the outside of the house this past month – an hour or two a day. He can’t physically get it all done by himself in a few days any more than I could physically get everything out by myself by the 30th.

Yes, I am definitely at fault here for not getting out on time; his anger and frustration are justified, and I am just as angry and frustrated with myself. But there is only so much I can do. I lost precious time trying to get us help from the organizations that were supposed to help us with the move; I lost more time because so much has to be done on other people’s schedules and takes so much damn time. Also, paying in order to make donations, and no one coming to pick them up has taken out a big chunk of my working time.

Also, we’ve lived there ten years. He’s made more than $100,000 on rent from us. The place hasn’t been painted since we moved in. There is some damage to the walls, where we hung things, but most of them are still in very good shape. We’ve lived with leaky windows that cost us a lot of extra cash in the winter to keep warm. The chimney’s never been cleaned in 10 years; we’ve never had the annual pest control we should have had; the back of the house was never painted when he had the front painted a few years back (and now, suddenly, that’s our fault? We told him the painters never came back).  When the one old fridge died, it was swapped out for the fridge that was original to the house, which is on its last legs; the carpets are 40+ years old, and while I will shampoo them because we have cats, they also need replacing.  We struggled for three years with a failing furnace until we got a new one, and that was done during a pandemic, with people traipsing in and out for estimates, etc., putting us at risk. So it’s not like everything that needs to be done that wasn’t done for the last ten years is our fault. We put in requests and things weren’t gotten around to until they were urgent. Most of the time, it was fine; stuff we could live with. But I’m not going to take the blame for it now.

Yes, not being able to get out on time is on me. I accept responsibility that I am a failure. No one is beating myself up about this more strongly than I am. But this is reality, and I have to deal with what’s in front of me and make it right. That’s what I’m trying to do.

I had hoped he’d take the next dumpster out of the security deposit, but I have to pay out of pocket. Another unexpected expense. So I’m keeping the GoFundMe fundraiser open again for a few more days to pay for that. We won’t be getting back any portion of our deposit, no matter how clean I leave the place.

Made arrangements for the dumpster swap, cleaned and packed more, got another load of stuff over to storage. My mom is fading and exhausted. She’s also creating more work for me, because she wants to help. I give her simple tasks that need to be done that aren’t taxing; she says she does them, but gets distracted and does something else (that has to be redone), and then there’s more work for me.

I’m also worried, because I haven’t been able to take on any work for two weeks, and now it will be three weeks. That’s a huge financial hit, and we have bills coming up.

Packed the car. We got a little bit of sleep, and were on the road just before 4 AM. The trip up was smooth, and we were home by 8 AM. The cats were fine and happy to see us (the arrangements we’d made for them in our absence worked).  Unloaded the car, and collapsed.

We unpacked part of the kitchen; we really need to do that in order to set up our kitchen table and give us some working room, so we can get going on the rest of the unpacking.

But we unpacked a bit, we rested; repeat.

The cats were happy to have it. It cooled down and started raining.

The postman stopped by with packages I’d mailed from the Cape. He then offered to drive back to the post office and pick up the packages we weren’t here to accept, and that’s what he did. How kind is that?

Turns out I had to dash down to the post office to mail the rent, because I couldn’t find our stamps that we bought just before coming up (bought for rent and bills). They are very nice there, but short staffed and every transaction was slow. But that’s okay; I wasn’t on a schedule.

I met a painter and a musician while waiting in line, and we discussed August Wilson, the playwright, because I bought the commemorative stamps. It was nice to talk about art. I want to be optimistic here; this seems like a place that’s more art-and-artist-oriented than the Cape. But then I remember how excited and delighted I was by everything when I first moved to the Cape, and it makes me tired. And jaded. I’m going to be cautiously optimistic, and not get caught up in things quite so fast, the way I jumped into doing things when we moved to the Cape.

That is fodder for another post in upcoming weeks.

Went to bed early; woke up early, feeling sick and exhausted. Everything hurts. I need to go to the grocery store to get my mom set up for the weekend. I head back down to Cape tomorrow morning. I have to stop at storage on my way in (losing more time) because I can’t get into my account to pay the bill that’s due tomorrow, and suddenly, they’re charging more for the second unit than they promised. Then, I’ll pick up the rug shampooer on my way in, and start the rug shampooing and that can dry while I work on the storage area. I plan to purge most of what’s left in the place; maybe salvage a few things. It’ll mean giving up lots and lots and lots of books, which breaks my heart, but that’s the reality.

It all has to be done by Monday night, so I can get the hell out of dodge by Tuesday morning. I won’t look back once I go over that bridge; I don’t want to turn into a pillar of salt.

I want to be able to return to visit, and to pick up stuff, with joy, not with sorrow or anger.

But first, I have to get this done.

Please hold a good thought for me, even though I probably don’t deserve it.

See you on the other side.

Published in: on July 2, 2021 at 8:17 am  Comments Off on Fri. July 2, 2021: Feeling Like A Failure  

Thurs. July 1, 2021: Where Are We?

(image courtesy of Arek Socha via

Did we get it done? If you’ve followed me on Twitter, you’ll know. Are we back up to start our new life yet, or still scrambling?

I don’t know, since this is scheduled to post.

Let’s hope we’re done, and resting.

Published in: on July 1, 2021 at 5:15 am  Comments Off on Thurs. July 1, 2021: Where Are We?  

Wed. June 30, 2021: Deadline Today

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Today is it. We have to be out of the house, whether we’ve gotten it all done or not. Hold a good thought for us, please.

Published in: on June 30, 2021 at 5:12 am  Comments Off on Wed. June 30, 2021: Deadline Today  

Tues. June 29, 2021: Life in DumpsterLand

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If all went to plan, the dumpster arrived yesterday afternoon and is getting a workout.

At 1 PM today, the guys arrive to cart the rest of our stuff to storage. Let’s hope I have it all sorted and packed.

Yesterday and today will be very long days.

Published in: on June 29, 2021 at 5:08 am  Comments Off on Tues. June 29, 2021: Life in DumpsterLand  

Mon. June 28, 2021: The Uphill Battle to Clear Out

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Monday, June 28, 2021

Waning Moon

Pluto Retrograde

Saturn Retrograde

Jupiter Retrograde

Neptune Retrograde

Hot and humid

We’re still going back and forth, in moving hell.

The movers showed up on the 22nd. They got the truck loaded in 3 hours, and off they went, which was great. We did a little packing and sorting otherwise, but were wrung out. I packed the car, except for the cats.

The cats were a little confused by the empty rooms, but as long as we were there, they weren’t too upset.

They were not happy to be caught and boxed the next morning, but we managed to be on the road a little before 4.

The trip was relatively smooth, although Tessa frequently demanded to see the manager, because she had a COMPLAINT.

Tessa took over in the empty apartment. Willa and Charlotte were unsure, but Tessa was fine.

However, when the movers finally arrived (an hour late, thanks to road construction), Tessa was unhappy again. We kept the cats in their playpens on the front porch while the movers unloaded – also very fast.

They did not add a bunch of extra charges, which was great.

We spent the afternoon resting and puttering. Charlotte is delighted by the new space. She just adores it.

We set up the back balcony to be a version of our Enchanted Garden. It’s quite lovely.

I broke one of my own rules, and we went to Walmart. Now, I will usually drive 150 miles out of my way not to shop at Walmart, and I have, but I had no capacity for anything left, and we needed a few things. So we went to the Walmart down the road, which looks new and clean.

What an awful store. We got a few things, but, really, don’t ever tell me people shop at Walmart because it’s cheap. Target’s prices are better, and so it their quality. Hell, Stop & Shop’s prices are better, and so is their quality.

But I sucked it up and we got what we needed. I cooked our first meal, and we ate out on the back balcony, at our little bistro table.


Went to bed early. Slept well for the first time in months. Tessa and Charlotte both want my room to be part of their territory, although Tessa has claimed the front porch.

Thursday was about resting, unpacking a little, and puttering. The difference between me and my mom: she has to unpack her room first; I started unpacking the kitchen. I unpacked the pantry goods I’d accumulated during the pandemic – we will not have to shop for staples for a good, long time.

I picked up my Spectrum internet equipment (it was just down the street). Their constant upselling drives me crazy. ALL I WANT IS INTERNET, LEAVE ME THE F ALONE!

The self-install took two hours and six different technicians, but it works.

Then Comcast argued with me about the cancellation, because they “plan” to have coverage in the area “soon.” Honey, that doesn’t help me NOW with my work, so shut the F up and cancel the account.

Put together what we needed to take back to Cape. Up very early on Friday, on the road by 6:30 to miss the worst of the traffic around Worcester. We were back on Cape around 10:30, ran some errands, and back at the house by 11.

We spent the afternoon packing/purging, and I just ran out of steam by 8 PM. Couldn’t do any more. I finalized the dumpster and hired a couple of guys to help with a storage run on Tuesday. Got dinner from Osterville Fish Market – my mom craved their fish & chips, and I had the fish tacos. Delicious!

But we slept well, even on our little pallets.

Up early Saturday. Did a storage run. Did a dump run. Dropped off hazardous wastes. Dropped off more donations at the library. Mailed a few boxes to myself.

Finished packing the stillroom, which took more time than it should have. It’s hard to put all that stuff in storage, because I use it regularly. It’s also amazing how much we saved of things like glass jars and plastic containers. Tossed a lot.

A friend came and loaded his car full of Christmas decorations, which he will bring up to us later in the summer. Very kind of him.

Packed some more out of my closet, cleaned out the front closet. We will have to put the winter coats into storage. There’s no room in the car to get them up.

The basement, laundry room, and storage over the garage are still overwhelming. How am I going to get it all done, even getting rid of a lot?

Worked until about 9 PM Saturday, when I ran out of steam. I physically can’t do the hours needed to get it all done.

Up early on Sunday. Ran a load over to storage. Back and packed the car, and we drove up to the new place. The Pike was, for all intents and purposes, closed for road work, so we took Rt. 2. Really pretty until the Alp-like driving for the last 30 miles or so. If I wasn’t so exhausted, I wouldn’t mind.

Unloaded and were all settled in by noon. The cats were happy to see us. The apartment hadn’t gotten too hot.

I sat down on the sofa for a few minutes, and woke up four hours later.

I hope I can pull it together and get my head in the game to get this last push done.

This morning, we are headed back to Cape again, for the final push. The dumpster arrives at 3-ish. Hopefully, once we get that loaded, it will feel like we’re making progress.

I have to work as long and hard as I can to get the boxes sorted for storage. The guys come at 1 PM on Tuesday, whether or not I’m ready.

Then, it’s the last stuff to storage and cleaning. We have to be out on Wednesday. I will be so relieved to be up here for good as of July 1.

I am exhausted.

I am also grateful for all the support, especially during the times I’ve fallen into despair.

Normally, I wouldn’t be so specific about the comings and goings, for security reasons, but neighbors are keeping an eye on things here, and anyone dumb enough to break into the house on Cape would run screaming.

Peace, friends, and hold stamina and good energy thoughts for me over the next few days.

Published in: on June 28, 2021 at 5:04 am  Comments (2)  

Fri. June 25, 2021

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Depending on whether Plan A, Plan B, or Plan C is implemented, there’s a good chance we are cleaning. Somewhere.

Published in: on June 25, 2021 at 4:24 am  Comments Off on Fri. June 25, 2021  

Thurs. June 24, 2021: Full Moon

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Full moon, Mercury’s direct, hopefully the move happened according to plan, and we are unpacking. Hold a good thought for us.

Published in: on June 24, 2021 at 4:22 am  Comments Off on Thurs. June 24, 2021: Full Moon  

Wed. June 23, 2021: Moving In Day

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This was supposed to be our recovery day, but with the adjusted schedule, this should be the day we are on the road with the cats before 5 AM and headed up to meet the movers to unload. Let’s hope they don’t come up with a lot of weird extra charges.

Published in: on June 23, 2021 at 4:19 am  Comments Off on Wed. June 23, 2021: Moving In Day  

Tues. June 22, 2021: Revised Moving Out Day


(image courtesy of Mohammad Hassan via

This is the revised load out day. Fingers crossed it goes well.

Hold a good thought for me that it all goes smoothly.

Mercury goes direct today, which could make things tricky, although it will be great to have it out of retrograde.

Published in: on June 22, 2021 at 4:15 am  Comments Off on Tues. June 22, 2021: Revised Moving Out Day  

Mon. June 21, 2021: Things Keep Changing (Update)

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Monday, June 21, 2021

Waxing Moon

Pluto Retrograde

Saturn Retrograde

Mercury Retrograde

Jupiter Retrograde

Hot and humid

Guess why I’m posting this? The movers pushed our load out day out by one day.

So we busted our asses until nearly midnight last night and collapsed. . .and no movers today.

It was a hellish weekend of packing, purging, feeling overwhelmed. Also, my main remote job is dragging their feet on payment. The last two payment cycles were early. This is now late. And this is the time I really counted on it. I specifically took on extra work the first two weeks of June because I knew it would be loony tunes for the last two.

But, anyway, there’s still a fuckton of purging and getting stuff to storage that needs to happen. So, we’re doing some of it today, instead of just waiting until we come back down later in the week to do it.

Although I’m bone weary and everything hurts, so I’m not moving as fast as I should.

At least Mercury goes direct tomorrow, once we’re loaded up, so, although the day could be chaotic, Wednesday should be better for driving and unloading.

Let landlords on both ends know what’s going on, rescheduled my Spectrum internet equipment pickup. Which took nearly an hour, because Spectrum might just be worse than Comcast, something I didn’t think was possible.

Headed out to storage; will do a dump run, and also pull some stuff up from the basement that’s going to the dump, and then work on some other packing/purging/organizing.

On the way back from storage, stopped in Mashpee at Asia for takeout. Yummy! I sat there, deconstructing it, so I can make it at the new place. There’s supposedly a good Asian grocery store in Pittsfield, and another good one in Hadley (the nearest Trader Joe’s is in Hadley).

Our lamps are packed, so as soon as it gets dark, off to bed!

Summer Solstice was yesterday, and we used the light as long as we could (all the lamps were already packed upstairs), and then kept packing downstairs, where there are a few overheads, and some lamps I didn’t pack until this morning – when I had to do an emergency run to Home Depot for the right size box.

Our lovely next-door neighbor is making dinner for us tomorrow and dropping it by once the movers leave. I was so grateful, I nearly cried.

But then, I’ve been a waterworks for the last few months.

Anyway, I’m at the state of exhaustion where I’m about to become babbling and incoherent, so I’ll stop now, and update when I can.

Peace, friends, and hold a good thought.

Published in: on June 21, 2021 at 12:29 pm  Comments Off on Mon. June 21, 2021: Things Keep Changing (Update)  

Mon. June 21, 2021: Moving Out Day


(image courtesy of Fabianne Sibbio via

Today is the day we move out of the little red house in Centerville, where we’ve lived for just over a decade. I’m so exhausted and overwhelmed that I can’t even process those emotions.

My intent for the week is surviving the move.

Catch you on the other side.

Published in: on June 21, 2021 at 4:12 am  Comments Off on Mon. June 21, 2021: Moving Out Day