I’m working on the premise that the lease will come through this week and everything will be settled for the new place.
Therefore, the focus this week is packing, getting moving quotes, purging, getting stuff up on craigslist.
A destination helps me focus, and helps me decide what to pack for the new house, what to pack for storage, and what can really be released.
Hold a good thought for me that it will all work out, because if it doesn’t, we are in serious, serious peril.
Friday, May 28, 2021
Waning Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Saturn Retrograde
Mercury Goes Retrograde tomorrow
Partly cloudy and pleasant
A post went up over on Gratitude and Growth yesterday about the garden. I will miss having a garden when we leave.
Wednesday was a full moon AND a lunar eclipse. With two retrogrades, and a third looming (Mercury is always the most challenging retrograde for me).
However, big changes and big decisions are necessary. I can’t be held hostage by the retrogrades. What I can do is understand the energy shifts, and then use them the best way I can to support what needs to happen in my life.
Yes, I like to hunker down and be a hermit during serious retrogrades; that is not an option for me this time around.
What IS necessary is to use the retrograde energy to make positive changes.
Retrogrades slow things down; they are also about resolving unresolved issues. Moving, life and job and location and career directions have all been unresolved for several cycles. I’ve been sorting through options, trying to find something that works for where I am and where I want to be. So even though there are multiple retrogrades stacking up, the fact that I’m resolving these issues clears the way for things to open when things go direct in October.
Instead of focusing on the obstacles and challenges of the retrogrades, I’m trying to recognize that there will be obstacles and challenges, but focus on the enormous changes necessary in order to clear the path for something better.
One of the things I need to work on during the retrogrades is being kinder to myself. I’ve been cruel to myself, and that doesn’t solve anything.
To catch you up on everything:
Wednesday was my last day with the onsite client. I came in and wrapped up the few things that still needed attention. I’ve basically written a handbook about how I did various things, making it clear that it doesn’t have to be done that way just because that’s the way I did it; everything can be adapted to suit changing needs.
All the office computers and the client’s personal devices connected to the office computers went down. She couldn’t understand why I couldn’t fix it. For the 70 millionth time, I said, “Because I’m not an IT person.” We had to call the IT guy who comes in to fix things so he could re-network everything.
The client was negative, negative, negative about everything having to do with the house hunting. On the one hand, it was “this will be a good fresh start, I want what’s best for you” and on the other it was about how the landlord I was meeting the next day was bound to try to scam me, and how I “couldn’t” sign a contract until July because of Mercury retrograde. Well, I’m not going to lose my next home because of astrology. I’m going to trust my instincts, and do what needs to be done.
It was absolute chaos by the time I had to leave at noon. There was barely a goodbye, and certainly not a “thank you for your work.” Part of me was a little hurt by that; I’ve been there nearly four years. Another part of me was relieved that there wasn’t any fuss. A third part of me (because I have many facets – yes, there’s some sarcasm involved in that comment) also feels that we’re all going through a lot right now, and we just have to cut each other breaks. The reality was that it’s all fine, and we’re all starting in new directions that are best for ALL of us. I need work that is more aligned with what I do and my career goals; they need a combination of warehouse worker, data entry clerk, and receptionist as they tackle the reopening challenges. All of this is positive.
There was a huge sense of both exhaustion and relief as I drove away.
After over a year of being expected to die for my employer, I am finished. I am working fully remote. The fact that it wound up happening on a full moon is good. Now, I can use the waning moon cycle to purge.
Home, celebratory martini with lunch, Remote Chat, which was fun. Took a rest, then, in the late afternoon, typed up my script coverage notes and sent them off. I will turn around one more script this week and answer questions on a script I covered. The rest of the weekend has to be about packing and purging. And maybe a little rest.
We also picked up a rental car from Budget this time, instead of Enterprise, for the trip. One of the headlights in the Rabbit is out, and I need an oil change; I didn’t want to risk the trip. The rental was a Nissan Altima. Instead of a tuna can on wheels, like the last rental, this one was like a rolling armchair. And only $6 more.
Prepared all the papers, maps, etc., that we needed. Went to bed early.
My mom didn’t sleep at all. Not knowing where we will move has taken a huge toll on us. I was up just before 4. We did our morning routines, and hit the road by 5. We made good time and hit our destination a little after 9. It took some doing to find the house, but we did.
We had a great meeting, loved-loved-loved the space. The landlord is a great guy, and owns most of the neighborhood. The space is amazing. He offered us the space, we said yes. We put down a deposit, he gave us a receipt, and we still have to do the paperwork. Until the paperwork is sorted, I will be nervous, but it looks like we have a new home. I’m not going to give any more details than that publicly until everything is signed.
We were practically shaking with relief when we got back to the car.
We drove straight back, trying to avoid the worst of the early Memorial Day weekend traffic. We swung by Burger King to pick up lunch – which made us both very, very sick. We got away with a hamburger once a few weeks ago, but this time, no dice.
Turned in the car, came home, and collapsed. I took care of watering the lawn and cleaning things up. My mom went to be a little after 6 PM. I was in bed not much past 7. We were wiped out.
We did manage a celebratory final session of the Knowledge Unicorns. I am so proud of these kids and what they achieved under difficult circumstances this school year. Best of all, they are all still alive, and so are their parents. I am honored to have been part of this.
Up early this morning. Still feel drained because of the adrenalin crash and the relief. I have to gear up for packing; on Tuesday, I will start getting quotes for the moving truck. I’m worried that the move will be expensive, although it is an in-state move.
I’ll have to purge more.
I’m coming to terms with the fact that I have to give up the dollhouse my dad built me, back in the 1970s, from cardboard and Contact paper. It’s a connection to my dad, who died in 1972. But I don’t have the room and it’s not like I’d set it up again. I’ll photograph it and let it go. I’d decided to give up the push mower, then decided to keep it, now I decided to give it up again. Even if/when we move to a house again, I’m going to hire someone to mow the lawn.
Saturn return life lesson learned: I hate mowing, and I’m not going to beat myself up about it.
We can’t take most of our big potted plants, so I’m going to ask some neighbors who garden if they want them; otherwise, I’ll put them up on craigslist.
I have to do a grocery run to Trader Joe’s; then I’m going to work on my final script of the week/month, and get back to packing.
Like I said, I’m going to be nervous until all the paperwork is signed, but fingers crossed that it all works out.
Peace, friends, and have a great Memorial Day weekend.
We will be packing.
First day of freedom from onsite work, and we are going on house hunting adventures!
Hold a good thought for us, please!
Will share what I can tomorrow.
Wednesday, May 26, 2021
Full Moon
Lunar Eclipse
Pluto Retrograde
Saturn Retrograde
Cloudy and warm
Today is my last day onsite with my local client. It’ll be interesting to see how that all shakes out. I started there in October of 2017. Definitely time for a change.
I was up way too early yesterday, although I got some sleep. Puttered around, read, not being very productive. Gearing up, mentally and physically, for an intense weekend of packing, although I do intend to give myself breaks here and there.
I went into the office for a few hours, to clean up some stuff and to work on the Cheat Sheets with instructions of how to do various things that I’m leaving my replacement.
Dropped off a stack of library books. Swung by CVS to get a new pair of clip-on sunglasses for the summer. Nothing really fit properly, but I have something with which I can get by.
Typed up and sent off script coverage on two pilots. Read a feature, which I didn’t like at the beginning, but loved by the end. I will write that up and send it off today.
Not sure how much coverage I will take on in the next few days. Tomorrow is busy, and then there’s Memorial Day weekend. Maybe I’ll do one or two more? Last week, I had a really solid coverage week; this week is a little less due to the house hunting. There are some interesting things coming up via the agency, but I’m hesitant to take anything that intense on until we’re moved. That may make June a lean month, and I need it to be a lucrative one. But if I break my health, it will derail the move and set us back further.
We have an appointment to see a place tomorrow that seems perfect. Fingers crossed that it really is the right place for us, and that the landlord likes us well enough to rent it to us. The space is great, the price is perfect, and the location is a good place for our next chapter.
I hope I don’t run out of boxes for the packing.
I also need to purge more.
It took me 35 minutes to drive 8 miles yesterday to get to the office. We are already at July levels of traffic, and the incoming tourists are ruder and meaner than ever. Everyone here is expected to Die for Tourist Dollars starting this weekend.
Knowledge Unicorns was fine. The kids are exhausted, scared, and excited to end the school year and start their summer. The parents are all just exhausted. Last session tomorrow.
Hold a good thought for me that tomorrow goes well.
All these retrogrades, and I have to make major life changes. But retrogrades are about resolving unresolved issues, and what’s a bigger unresolved issue than not knowing where we’ll live for the next cycle?
Peace, friends.
Tuesday, May 25, 2021
First Day of Full Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Saturn Retrograde
Sunny and pleasant
The weather is gorgeous, and I am absolutely drunk on lilacs. DRUNK ON LILACS is actually a title for a friend’s WIP. She’s been a good reader on my work, especially my Coventina Circle series; I’m excited to read her book, once she’s ready.
It was a bit of an overwhelming few days, especially on the house front. Looked at a lot of listings. Found a few that sounded decent, and one that sounds absolutely perfect. The guy’s description was great, and he had a couple of lines in the description with which I just connected.
Heard back from a question I’d sent through Zillow, and went back and forth with the agent, to the point of putting in an application (even though it wasn’t the one that was so absolutely perfect), only to then hear back from my due diligence work that the guy had no authority to rent the apartment, and, in fact, it had been rented for months. I didn’t have my bank information or social security number on the application, but, in any event, I warned my references, warned the bank, and filed an IC3 with the FBI.
The due diligence on the place we really love is coming out clean – the guy is who he says he is, we had some good exchanges via email, and then a great phone conversation on Monday. So, fingers crossed that it all comes through. We plan on seeing it on Thursday.
On a happier note, I love, love, love the script coverage job. I’m already earning more than I did with my onsite client (it’s nice to have the overlap with two incomes coming in for a couple of weeks). In my first two weeks, I’ve received 5 “writer satisfaction” bonuses (where the writer liked my feedback and found it useful), and one tip. I’ve read 11 scripts, so it’s nearly half.
I’m on track to earn at least double from this job than what I earned from my onsite client; with other freelance work picking up, we should be okay. But landlords want guaranteed income, not estimated income, and what I made the last few years is irrelevant to what I’m making in the next few months. Although all of it is more than enough to cover rent and expenses.
At least, as of Saturday, I’m fully vaccinated.
Overwhelmed, but fully vaccinated.
Working on cleaning out the garage. Packing, Purging. Dump runs. Trying to keep up with earning money. House hunting.
I am one of those freaks that is very, very happy when I take recycling to the dump.
Then, Monday morning, I go outside to check the grass and make sure the wasps aren’t building a nest and chasing the woodpecker from the house – and there were giant ants coming out of the seam of the deck roof over the kitchen door.
I hate ants.
These were giant ants.
I hosed them off the deck and then sprayed the seam with ant killer. I looked up online what they were – carpenter ants. Bad news.
I called the landlord, he came over, and we figured out a plan of action. He wasn’t as upset as I was about it. I was picturing the back of the house coming down from the chomping. Because there are never just a few ants.
There aren’t any ants inside the house – we had sugar ants during the septic switch out and I scrubbed with vinegar every day, so once they were gone, they were gone. We’re keeping an eye out. I have permission to use chemicals as necessary (usually we use all organic).
He also mowed the front for us, which was very nice.
I got into the office later than usual for me, but was still the first one there. Had a decent workday. I’m setting everything up as clearly and as smoothly as I can for my replacement. Because I wish someone had done that for me in oh, so many jobs! Came home, had my phone meeting, sorted everything out for Thursday’s viewing.
More script coverage, more packing.
I hope Thursday works well. We love the pictures of the place, the sound of it, it’s in our budget, in an area we really like, and I really, really, REALLY liked talking with the landlord.
Fingers crossed. At this point, I’m almost afraid to hope, but it feels right. I want a place that feels right, where we can feel at home, and live our lives quietly.
I feel as though the sledgehammer is beating down on me. I have to overcome the paralyzing fear and do what needs to be done to resolve the housing crisis. I’m working on it every day, and feeling so overwhelmed, I don’t know what to do. Time is running out.
My intent for the week is to overcome the fear and find a solution.
Friday, May 21, 2021
Waxing Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Foggy and cooler
Yesterday was another day that was all over the place.
I was up worrying way too early. Got up early, fed the cats, dozed on the couch a bit, which calmed Charlotte’s anxiety a bit.
Cleaned out the garage some more; almost finished sorting all the plant pots. I mean, there’s a lot more to do in the garage, but getting that done will make a big difference.
Handled a few things for the soon-to-be-ex client. Sent off a bunch of LOIs. Sent off rental application information. Most of these “property management companies” ask for inappropriate information and wanting me to carry 100K of renters’ insurance “in case I damage the apartment” is way out of line when there’s a security deposit involved. That’s what the deposit is for. Also, the properties that want additional monthly payments per cat – ridiculous. Again, that’s what a security deposit is for. And who can apply to dozens of rentals when every place has an exorbitant fee just to apply? It should be illegal.
The housing crisis was manufactured by landlords, and they need much harsher regulation.
Got my hair cut. I think the last time was October 2019. The hairdresser chopped about a foot off. She really didn’t do much other than cut the length off and do a bit of cleaning up. I wish the guy who gave me the great cut in 2019 was there, but he wasn’t. She was supremely disinterested in being there and doing much. On the one hand, I didn’t need much done, and she told me that the hair salon opened LAST MAY, at the height of the pandemic, so everyone’s stressed and completely burned out. I wasn’t going to fuss, because the cut is perfectly functional. I just would have liked a bit more care and attention devoted to it. Like, maybe even 5 more minutes. I was in and out of the salon in 10 minutes. But again, they’ve been under huge stress and burnout, and the cut is fine. It’s not brilliant, but it does the job. And yes, I tipped well, because hairdressers have been under huge stress for the duration.
I feel so much better, too. I just don’t feel as brilliant as I felt with the last cut.
But then, in the ten years I lived on Cape Cod, I’ve only had two haircuts that were good; most were serviceable, and some were truly awful.
And yes, we were all masked, thank goodness.
Came home and worked. Got out coverage of one script; read another one; claimed two more that I will read and turn around today and tomorrow. I’m getting into the flow of it.
Knowledge Unicorns was fine. Last week will be our final week. Most schools are running into June, and the kids and parents will be in touch with each other, but the official online homework group will be finished as of next Thursday.
Managed to sleep until 2 AM before I woke up worrying. Charlotte started fussing at 3. I let her into the bedroom. She was good for awhile, all purry and cuddly, but then she started fussing at Tessa, so she got kicked out of the room.
We are really at a crisis point in the house hunt. We need to get out of here. We are perfectly capable of steadily paying rent on the places to which we’re applying, but we’re being turned down because the overall income isn’t high enough to please the landlord. As long as we pay rent – and since we have decades’ worth of positive rent-paying history – that should count more than an overall number.
People deserve decent living situations. It shouldn’t be this impossible to find a clean, safe place to live in our budget.
Anyway, I’m off to clean out more of the garage. I actually forgot to do a grocery run yesterday, so I’ll have to do it today.
Most of the day will be script coverage and trying to finish that damn article that’s not working. The weekend has to be house hunting and packing.
12 more hours spread over 3 days. #CountdownToFreedom.
Peace friends.
Thursday, May 20, 2021
Waxing Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Sunny and pleasant
I have a post over on Gratitude and Growth about the lilacs. More photos, too.
Yesterday was a little all over the place. I was up half the night, worrying. Worked on cleaning out the garage early in the morning. I got out some LOIs and some rental information requests. Heard back from some of the rental possibilities, and am waiting to hear back from another one that sounds fantastic and is in a place we love.
Went to the client’s. She was fine today, acting like Monday’s outbursts never happened. We got a lot done. She interviewed someone to replace me, who would be good. The second interview of the day didn’t show up. Two more are being set up for early next week.
I’m under no illusion of not being replaceable. I know I am; in fact, they need someone with different skills to replace me, because the focus of the business, for the next few months, is not on what I’ve been doing, but on other stuff I don’t do and don’t want to do. So it’s all good. I’m wrapping things up and writing up notes and cheat sheets. And, I’ve always believed that it’s important to set things up so it can run without a particular individual, because one never knows what life brings. Hoarding information and knowledge sets a bad tone.
I was exhausted by the time I left; picked up a prescription for my mom. Got home, had a few exchanges about rentals, joined Remote Chat, which was fun.
I was wrecked after chat. I rested for a bit (reading the latest Donna Leon Brunetti mystery). Then, we took the cats out on the deck in their playpens while I watered the grass, and I read another script. I’ll write up the coverage today.
Collapsed into bed early, which meant that I was up by 1 AM again, worrying. Charlotte started fussing around 4, as usual. I got up and fed everyone, then settled on the couch for about 45 minutes, which calmed Charlotte down, and I got a bit of a doze.
Getting ready to do some more work in the garage. Then, I’ll get out some LOIs, join the online meditation group, and I have a few errands to run this morning, before getting back to the script coverage job, articles, LOIs, packing, and house hunting.
To say I’m exhausted is an understatement.
Wednesday, May 19, 2021
Waxing Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Still dark out
Yesterday wasn’t too bad, but I’m gearing up for today.
I was up early, cleared out some more in the garage first thing. Got appropriately dressed, and headed on site to the client’s. I had the office to myself, which is as it should be. I cleared up a bunch of stuff that needed to be cleared, tossed out a big stack of my own scribbled notes on this and that which I no longer need, filed, wrote up the notes for what I’m wrapping up, with each thing dated. I will keep one copy for myself in case there are any questions. I will keep adding to it until I leave.
I took down the online store I’d set up during the pandemic, closed out some of the social media accounts. The client seems to think this will upset me (and is happy about it), because of the work I put in to create and maintain them; but it’s not about me. I did the work that was necessary at the time; the client does not want the new person to maintain the sites. Ergo, it makes sense to take them down. It has nothing to do with me. This is what the client wants as part of my wrap-up; then this is what I’ll do.
Taking down the Square store took some doing, because, of course, the information in the tutorials and what came up on the screen had little to do with each other. But I got it done.
Worked ahead on email blasts – I’m trying to get the next few months’ worth done, so all they have to do is send them. The client is grumbling about that, too, so I created cheat sheets both on sending emails already drafted, and creating new ones from scratch. I write good step-by-step directions; if the client or the new employee choose not to read/follow the directions, again, that has nothing to do with me.
There were some responses to the job ad posted on Indeed the previous day; with the client’s permission, I went ahead and set up some interviews.
I left on time, with the client constantly emailing me for this, that, the other well into the evening, which will have to stop. I didn’t get one of the emails until I got up this morning. I am not on call.
I came home to find my mother very, very upset. Against my advice, she’d called the family in Maine, to check in and see how they were doing, and let them know the progress (or lack thereof) in the house hunting. Instead of offering supportive solutions, they said the following were “our only choices”:
–get rid of the cats
–get rid of all our furniture, mementos of our trips, gifts, etc., and, especially, my books because “you don’t need books” – um, yeah, I do, I’m a writer. I have four floor-to-ceiling bookcases in my office of the books that I use constantly, and I’m always digging through for the other books.
–I’m supposed to go to the Town Manager. He will find my mother a “room” in an elder care facility, because she’s 96 and doesn’t need more than that (the subtext being she’s going to die soon, so why not die alone in a shabby room).
–I’m supposed to rent a room in someone else’s house
–I shouldn’t have given my notice to the onsite job, and the client’s behavior toward me was totally justified (the threats and verbal abuse)
–Oh, and we deserve all of this since I’ve “played” at being in the arts all this time, instead of getting a “real job.” Right. Broadway’s not a real job. Copywriting and marketing aren’t real jobs.
We’re not being separated, and I’m not putting my mother “away.” We’re not getting rid of the cats; they’re family. We may well have to put some things in storage, and I am purging quite a bit; even if I wanted to find a share, there aren’t any in all of Cape Cod.
To build on a previous post about the moans of “no one wants to work” – no one can find any housing. A colleague at my client’s called me to offer support and apology for the way the client is behaving towards me. She told me that she’s renting a room to a kid out of college who wants to work in her friend’s new restaurant, but would be forced to turn down the job because there isn’t any housing; another friend of hers is also renting a room she had no intention of renting for the summer to another restaurant worker, who would also have had to turn down the job due to lack of housing. There’s a housing crisis here – a completely manufactured one, by the towns allowing corporations and shell companies to buy everything up as short-term rentals at huge prices. Where do all these tourists and visitors think they’re going to eat and shop and do activities when there’s no housing for those who would work there?
There is no need for a housing crisis, except that the towns are greedy, and are allowing shady corporations to come in and destroy everything.
Tangent, but a necessary one. So much for family, right? They’re not required to fix anything financially or offer us shelter (although they own plenty of real estate). But emotional support rather than cruelty would be nice. They’re not being “realistic” and “honest”. They’re being cruel. And, since two years ago, they helped out with that major car repair, they feel they have the right to dictate these choices now. My mother and I are the cheeses that stand alone, I guess.
No idea where we will end up, but it needs to be in a town that’s not tourist-centric.
Managed to take an hour outside on the deck, with the cats in their playpens, to read and enjoy being outside as I ran the sprinklers. It’s actually really fun to watch the grass grow.
We came in so covered in pollen that I had to take a shower and scrub down. I also had to scrub the tub out, because the pollen I washed off glopped in the bottom.
Knowledge Unicorns was fine. We are so ready for the end of the school year. This attitude of some of the schools to force kids back to in-person learning for the last month of school is ridiculous. Some of their schools are no longer doing virtual learning, and refuse the online option. So the kids are taking the assignments and doing them without any classroom support, just what we do in the homework group, each other, and their parents.
You know what else would be nice? If society didn’t use school as child care, and if it was actually, you know, education.
Wrote up the script coverage for the script I read yesterday. I have two scripts to read, still, this week, and might take on a third. I should have done more, but I’ve felt so beaten down.
My Llewellyn editor is contracting me for the 2023 almanacs, which is great. I got the next book assigned for review. I sent out a bunch of LOIs.
Read a bit at night, went to bed early. Wasn’t on email, so didn’t get some of the client emails until this morning. Have to set more boundaries today, for these last few days (16 hours spread over 4 days). Of course, I may get fed up if she goes on another rant today, and leave today.
Nothing like leaping into the day with no idea of where I’ll be by the end of it.
Tuesday, May 18, 2021
Waxing Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Sunny and warm
Well, it’s been an interesting few days.
On Friday morning, after sending out a slew of LOIs, I went onsite to a client’s, and told her I was giving two weeks’ notice. It’s the last onsite client with whom I’ve been working since the start of the pandemic. The scope is changing into something that’s not what I do, and I also don’t want to work from the office. Since we’ll be moving off-Cape, probably not in commutable distance, it doesn’t make sense. It makes more sense to leave now (well, in two weeks) before things ramp up for tourist season, than when things get too busy. The conversation went well; we will see how the next two weeks go.
Driving away from there, I felt a huge weight had been lifted; while I am sure the next two weeks will be challenging, it was the right choice, right now, for all of us. They can hire someone who wants to be there, who can do the physical lifting and shipping and whatever else changes in the scope of the job, and I can move on to work for which I’m better suited.
I’d written up a comprehensive job description for them to list; if the ad went up Friday, resumes would come in over the weekend, they could interview/hire next week, and they will be some overlap the following week. I saw the ad they posted – used the intro paragraph and no financial information. If they don’t get a lot of resumes, they’ll blame the whole “no one wants to work” myth.
But that’s not my problem anymore.
When it comes to the myth, remember:
–nearly 600,000 people died in the past year, and that’s what we know about. Most of those people had jobs. Those individuals are DEAD. They no longer exist to fill those jobs. That’s nearly three times the year-round population of Cape Cod.
–Around here, many of those people died because they were put in unsafe working situations by their employer. Last summer was a nightmare of “Die For Your Employer” and “Die For Tourist Dollars” which made the Cape a red zone for COVID from the autumn until just a few weeks ago.
–People who were laid off/furloughed don’t owe loyalty to companies who showed no loyalty toward them when things got difficult.
–Somewhere between 100 and 200 people in my wide network of acquaintances discovered that they can do other things and liked doing it. Many of them started on new career paths that pay better and are more fulfilling.
–I see a couple of dozen of excited posts a day about people starting new jobs and being happy about it.
“No one wants to work because the gubberment pays too much” is a malignant myth by those who are frustrated they don’t have enough people to exploit.
I sent out LOIs, ran some errands, and read, both for the script coverage job and for pleasure. I really enjoy the script coverage job. I just hope I can keep up the pace, and even pick it up a little.
House-hunted sent out a bunch of requests, dithered. I can’t afford to pay multiple application fees for places we won’t get. I just can’t. That cuts into moving money. I also think it’s yet another scam by landlords/property companies to make money off people who need to find a place to live.
House hunted all weekend, actually, and sent off a bunch of enquiries. Fingers crossed I hear something back that’s positive.
Worked on some script coverage over the weekend, although I’m trying to keep weekends clear of that work. Kept up with watering the yard. Did some grocery runs. Did a dump run with garbage/yard waste/recycling. We’re cleaning out the garage. I’m tidying and packing up the pots, and seeing what we can toss. I have a feeling there will be multiple dump runs in the coming weeks.
Did eight loads of laundry done on Saturday, including switching out the curtains, and washing blankets and covers and stuff that can be packed away both for the move and until next winter.
I still wish that lovely little duplex in Bennington would come through for us, but I need to reconcile myself to the fact that it probably won’t.
A painter was supposed to come and take a look at what needs to be done to the outside of the house, and the landlord was going to stop by to see some tree work that needs to be done at the property line, but neither of those things happened. I just have to carry on with what I’m doing and not worry about the rest of it.
Got some packing done on Sunday in my office. I have to up the packing pace.
I’m reading the Meg Lanslow mystery GIFT OF THE MAGPIE by Donna Andrews, and it’s quite wonderful.
Read the book for review. Wrote the review, sent it off, waiting to get assigned my next book.
Got my first positive writer feedback from the script coverage job; a writer was really pleased with my comments. It’s a relief that I’m on the right track, at least for that particular writer. The place pays twice a month; I started near the end of the pay period, and they’ve already paid me for the work I did through the 15th, which is comforting.
I have to set up the binder and a new flash drive that’s just for the coverage this week.
Up early yesterday. Did some cleaning out in the garage first thing. Then it was the book review and LOIs. I had to go to the client’s in the morning for a few hours. Between this week and next week, I have a total of 24 hours spread over 6 days. My plan is to go in and get them as set up for the summer as I can, keep my head down and my mask on – because you know they’ll refuse to wear masks around me, even though I’m not considered fully vaccinated for another week, because “they’re tired of it.”
Looked at photos of hairstyles. As of Saturday, when I’m fully vaccinated, I plan to get my first haircut in 18 months.
Went into the client’s site to finish my last 24 hours spread over 6 days, winding up projects for her, and setting things up for whomever comes in next, if there’s no overlap. She became verbally abusive and completely, inappropriately unhinged, making threats. I told her to stop it; if this continues, I will not work out the two weeks. I gave notice as a courtesy; this is an at-will state. An employer can fire an employee without notice; an employee can quit without notice. Since I am on a W-2 instead of a 1099 with this particular client, those rules apply. This is a part-time job, with the job scope changing to something I don’t do, and the demand of being in-office when I’m leaving the area. The entire response to the perfectly reasonable notice is disturbing and inappropriate. Beyond hostile.
The above is another reason the PROACT, with the ABC Test, will hurt freelancers. This crap.
Not to mention she now refuses to wear a mask in the office, in spite of the fact that I’m not fully vaccinated for another week, and I don’t even know if the third person in the office is.
Nightmare. We will see what the next few days are like.
On top of that, she wants me to come in for one hour once a week indefinitely to “answer questions.” No. I’m working remotely for other clients past my end date. She can send me an email or book a (billed) phone call or Zoom call. I’m not losing half a workday to come onsite (when part of the reason I’m leaving is that I no longer do onsite work) to “answer questions.” Everything in my former job scope can be done remotely and should. The same with questions.
I should have tidied up the front lawn (too small a job to bring in my lawn guy), but I felt like I’d been battered. I managed to read a script for the script coverage job and take notes, which I will write up today.
My Llewellyn editor is going to contract me for the 2023 Almanacs. I’m excited.
I had a telehealth conference with my doctor. She was kind and helpful, and is referring me to resources I need to get through this next bit. I’m very grateful to her.
Felt sick most of the night, probably from stress. Up way too early. Posting this, then have to do some more work on the garage before I leave for the client’s – whether I stay there or not until the two weeks are up up in the air.
Peace, friends, and hold a good thought for me.
Friday, May 14, 2021
Waxing Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Sunny and pleasant
Somehow, yesterday seems like months ago.
Meditation was great. The theme was “self-compassion” which is something that I sorely needed (and continue to need).
I sent out a bunch of LOIs. Got an almost immediate response from one, asking for more samples and other information, which I turned around immediately.
I felt dizzy and exhausted off and on for most of the day, so I didn’t get as much other work done as I would have liked. I had to keep taking breaks.
Amongst all the reading I’m being paid to do, I’m reading a rather wonderful book for pleasure, DANCE WITH DEATH by Will Thomas.
I did not get an offer for the job where I blew the interview on Tuesday. They went with someone else (and were very nice about it, points to them for class). While the stability of the position was attractive, at least for the next stretch of time, the money meant I would have to take on a lot of extra work, and we just weren’t the right fit for each other. They made the best decision for everyone.
I took the day of script reading (which means I have to make up for it today, since I have coverage due tomorrow morning). I was just exhausted.
I didn’t get any packing or purging or cleaning up done.
Knowledge Unicorns was fine. The teens are getting appointments for their vaccines. The younger kids are jealous!
I did some house hunting; there was one possibility that looked good and wasn’t a scam, but I have a feeling it’s only a summer rental. Still, it was worth an email, and maybe I’ll hear back, or maybe I won’t.
I keep seeing us in that adorable little space in Bennington, even though someone else got it. It feels so vivid and right. I need to let go of it.
I was, however, weighing different scenarios on an issue that has to be faced down today. I’m going with my gut on it. Things have reached an untenable point, and, although what I’m going to do is a financial risk (which I shouldn’t take right now), it is also necessary. It has to be done in person today. It is mostly likely to be extremely unpleasant (potentially dangerous, since I am not considered fully vaccinated for another week); it could be a reasonable conversation that works well for all of us. The former is more likely than the latter. But I must remain calm and firm. I need to look after myself in this situation.
I’m weary and overwhelmed even anticipating what will happen, but it has to be done. I’m hoping that making this difficult decision and taking this risk will clear the way for something better. Because the situation now is unsustainable.
And then, we move forward. The next two weeks will be especially rough, but time moves forward no matter what, so it’s about getting to it.
I could use all the good thoughts you could spare today, on both this and the home front.
Have a great weekend, friends, and peace. We’ll catch up on Tuesday.
Thursday, May 13, 2021
Waxing Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Sunny and pleasant
I have a post on the garden progress over on Gratitude and Growth. The lilacs are blooming, which always makes me happy.
Yesterday was an enormously stressful day, and it’s not appropriate for me to discuss the details publicly. But, believe me, it sparked plenty of discussions on the home front about choices we need to make in order to move forward.
I’m hesitating to make a choice out of fear, but my gut is telling me it is vital to make this choice and make it NOW.
Was in touch with my doctor, and we have a telehealth consultation late Monday afternoon. That will help, although there are some decisions and actions that need to happen before Monday.
Remote Chat was a lot of fun. Turned around some more script coverage. I’m worried that I’m not giving them what they want; I’m happy to adjust to whatever they do want, but without knowing, I’m just plowing forward in the way I’ve been trained for this type of job. It’s a little nerve-wracking.
Still feel bad after the vaccine dose, but at least I’m on my feet, moving around, and keeping food down. Let’s celebrate the small improvements, shall we?
Watched a documentary about New Zealand last night, which was interesting. I only passed through New Zealand on my way to Australia when my show was in Adelaide, but the place fascinated me. I’ve always wanted to go back.
Online meditation group this morning (much needed), then client work, script coverage work, work on the short story and article, more LOIs, setting up more conversations with potential clients, packing, starting to clean out the garage. Busy day ahead, yeah?
Hope you have a good one!
Wednesday, May 12, 2021
Waxing Moon
Pluto Retrograde
Sunny and pleasant
I’m still struggling to get back on my feet after the second vaccine dose. I’m not complaining (exactly). I’m grateful to be vaccinated. But the process of getting my feet back under me after this shot has been difficult.
I managed a good night’s sleep for once, Monday into Tuesday, although I woke up feeling awful. I managed to shower and get dressed and even put some makeup on, and then I had to go and lie down again. The weakness and dizziness and nausea were overwhelming at times.
I considered trying to postpone the Zoom meeting with the potential new client, but I know they need to move forward, and with all the juggling I’m doing, I need to know if they’re going to make me an offer, so I went ahead. If I don’t get the offer, I have no one but myself to blame, both for not presenting well in that meeting and for being utterly myself on social media. And I will live with those consequences.
I was far, far, FAR from my best. I would say it was one of the worst interviews I’ve ever given in my rather long and varied career. I’m amazed I didn’t pass out during the meeting. There were one or two moments where I thought I would. On top of that, the landlord had landscapers walking around the house looking at what needs to be done. At one point, they were right up against the windows talking (although I think I only flinched once, and I’m not sure that was caught by the other meeting attendees). Charlotte nearly got into the picture at one point, but I managed to keep her off my lap and off camera. And, of course, the neighborhood tree cutters were out with their chainsaws destroying more habitat.
The work itself? I could do it. I’d be good at it. I have years of most of the skills they need. I’d sharpen some skills, especially with Excel and Adobe Creative Suite. I’m good at staying on deadline and keeping on top of organizational things, and it’s well within my field. I still might not be who they want and need for the position. And IF they make an offer, I have to look at the numbers and the benefits package and whether or not there’s relocation support. It’s not just me in a studio apartment with the cats. I have a household to run and family for whom to care. No matter how much the job is in an arena I love (and this one is), if I can’t make the numbers work and need to take on a bucket of extra work in order to survive when I’m already working full time – I have to see how it all balances out.
What I should have said when they asked what I’m going to do about my other clients is say, “With the salary discussed, I have to keep some of them while working for you” but I wasn’t on my game enough to be that straightforward. Which could also kybosh the whole thing, but it would have been a more solid answer.
The likelihood they would give me an offer after that dismal performance today? Maybe 1%. Possibly zero. I can’t imagine they don’t have better options from what they experienced this morning. When the best element of an interview is that one didn’t pass out, there’s a problem. Would it have been better to wait until I felt better? With so many other variables out there, maybe better for me, but they needed this to happen so they could make their decisions and move forward and stay on their schedule. And I need to know if I’m getting an offer, so I can figure out some of my own moving pieces.
As I said, I made the choices I made, I live with the consequences. Because hey, even if I had been at my best (or at least, better, or maybe even coherent), I STILL might not be what they’re looking for, and that is just the way things work out sometimes.
Still, by the end of the meeting, I was a total wreck.
I sent my thank you email. I got out a couple of LOIs. I sent the test sample contract to the other company who wanted me to go through a series of assessments.
I had an email meltdown with a friend who, because she’s a genuine friend, was very understanding.
I wrote up my next script coverage and sent that off.
I heard back from a few more LOIs who want to set up meetings to discuss upcoming projects. One of them even made it clear that any test samples requested are paid – and the rate they quoted me is more than satisfactory. So that’s an ethical company for whom I’d like to work.
Just for the record — I went back through the requests for unpaid labor/samples/tests as part of the interview process since February. Had I done them all, I would have put in 150 hours of unpaid labor since February. That’s 3.75 WEEKS of unpaid work. This is not counting the requests for one-way video interviews. I have a post on the actual cost of those up on Ink-Dipped Advice here.
And people wonder why I put together a contract for tests/assessments/project-specific samples.
Looked at some other rental possibilities online; got some paperwork to fill out. Will see if I can set up a few virtual tours for later this week.
Read the next script for coverage, and took a lot of notes. Will write them up later today and send them off. Was assigned the next script to cover, which I will read later today.
Tended to the lawn watering. I’m going to have to get the garage cleaned out this weekend, I think. I want to get it done before the landscapers start work, and I don’t think they’ll start work until the grass seed starts growing properly. I also want to put a few things up on craigslist. If I can get the ball rolling on that tomorrow, I’ll feel like I’ve made some progress.
Knowledge Unicorns was fine. They missed me last Thursday, although one of the parents covered. The teens are excited that they’ll be able to get vaccinated soon, too.
Watched the last season of WILLIAM AND MARY. That was really a lovely show.
Woke up at 3 worrying. Made the mistake of going on Twitter, where the BOSTON GLOBE has an editorial from a “behavioral scientist” about how working from home isn’t healthy or natural – citing studies from the 1970s. Yet another privileged misogynist who calls himself an “influencer” and was obviously paid by some corporate entity to write this crap. Probably the Chamber of Commerce or some commercial reality place.
Still feel like absolute crap. I have to go onsite with a client today – at least, I’ll make the effort, and if I feel too bad, I’ll leave. I need to get in touch with my doctor and see what’s what. Being under the kind of stress I’m under right now isn’t helping me heal from the vaccine dose, I’m sure; I also want to make sure I don’t make bad decisions while I’m feeling awful.
There’s Remote Chat today, which should be fun. I need to work on a short story due later this week, and on that article with which I’ve been struggling. A few calls for pitches landed on my desk (well, my inbox) yesterday, so I want to go through and see if there’s anything I should answer.
I desperately need rest, but I can’t right now, even though I know I’ll pay for not resting in a few days. Or maybe hours.
Onward.
Associate Member, PEN American Center
Archaeologist Dr. Gwen Finnegan is on the hunt for her lover’s killer. Shy historical researcher Justin Yates jumps at the chance to join her on a real adventure through Europe as they try to unspool fact from fiction in a multi-generational obsession with a statue of the goddess Medusa.
Buy links here.
When plans for their next expedition fall through, Gwen and Justin accept teaching jobs at different local universities. Adjusting to their day-to-day relationship, they are embroiled in two different, disturbing, paranormal situations that have more than one unusual crossing point. Can they work together to find the answers? Or are new temptations too much to resist? For whom are they willing to put their lives on the line? Available on multiple digital channels here.
NAUTICAL NAMASTE MYSTERIES
SAVASANA AT SEA
Yoga instructor Sophie Batchelder jumps at the chance to teach on a cruise ship when she loses her job and her boyfriend dumps her. But when her boss is murdered, Sophie must figure out who the real killer is -- before he turns her into a corpse, too. A Not-Quite-Cozy Mystery.
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COVENTINA CIRCLE ROMANTIC SUSPENSE
PLAYING THE ANGLES
Witchcraft, politics, and theatre collide as Morag D’Anneville and Secret Service agent Simon Keane fight to protect the Vice President of the United States -- or is it Morag who needs Simon’s protection more than the VP?
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THE SPIRIT REPOSITORY
Bonnie Chencko knows books change lives. She’s attracted to Rufus Van Dijk, the mysterious man who owns the bookshop in his ancestors’ building. A building filled with family ghosts, who are mysteriously disappearing. It’s up to Bonnie and her burgeoning Craft powers to rescue the spirits before their souls are lost forever. Buy Links here.
RELICS & REQUIEM
Amanda Breck’s complicated life gets more convoluted when she finds the body of Lena Morgan in Central Park, identical to Amanda’s dream. Detective Phineas Regan is one case away from retirement; the last thing he needs is a murder case tinged by the occult. The seeds of their attraction were planted months ago. But can they work together to stop a wily, vicious killer, or will the murderer destroy them both?
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Full Circle: An Ars Concordia Anthology. Edited by Colin Galbraith. My story is “Pauvre Bob”, set at Arlington Race Track in Illinois is included in this wonderful collection of short stories and poetry. You can download it free here.
Ink In My Coffee 