Mon. Jan. 21, 2019: Sickness & Guilt – #UpbeatAuthors

Monday, January 21, 2019
Full Moon
Martin Luther King Jr. Day

 

Let’s take a few minutes today to commit to the dream of a better, more equal world that Martin Luther King Jr. believed we could achieve.

I’ve been sick the last two weeks. Around here, we nickname it “the Cape Cod Crud.” It’s a cold, not anything that can be fixed with antibiotics, but it sticks around for weeks, especially the cough.

I had to cancel some client work and I’m behind on some other writing. I got my radio play in one time, because it’s about to go into casting, and because I did the rewrite as soon as I’d sat with the notes for a couple of days, instead of procrastinating. Of course, then it needed another rewrite, but at least I knew where I was going.

One of the self-care items on my list that I’m trying to come to terms with is to stop feeling guilty whenever I’m sick.

On an intellectual level, I know I’m sick. I know it makes more sense to stay home and get well instead of pushing and getting sicker. Also, I don’t want to expose anyone else to germs, and risk getting them sick.

But I feel guilty that I’m not getting things done.

Even though I communicate clearly and make alternate plans to make sure everything gets done when it needs to get done. I don’t just throw up my hands, announce, “I’m sick” and let it all go.

I plan, I communicate, I ask for help, I delegate.

Yet I still feel guilty.

When colleagues are sick, I’m happy to step in and help. I don’t think less of them because they’re sick. I want to lift some of the worry, take on something that needs to be done, so they can rest and not fret.

So why do I feel guilty when I’m the one asking?

It makes no sense.

All I can do is recognize that’s what’s going on, remind myself that I’ve made plans so things aren’t dropped or forgotten or ignored, and that I do my part of help when those around me are sick. The sooner I can take care of myself, the sooner I get well and can fulfill my commitments.

Because I make plans for the work that needs to be done while I’m sick, it eases the worry, and I can use the energy that would be used for worry for healing instead.

Now, if I could only do the same with the energy I waste on guilt!

How do you deal with this? Please share you ideas in the comments.

 

Published in: on January 21, 2019 at 6:08 am  Comments (5)  
Tags: , , ,

5 Comments

  1. I don’t mind reminding you that you’re sick, if you’d like. Sometimes, that’s all it needs, someone to agree with you and/or tell you that you’re sick.

    I’ve suffered the exact same for years. But I’m gradually retraining myself. And once I’ve given myself permission to be sick, or reminded myself that if I went out to work I probably wouldn’t go (for the reason of spreading germs), then it’s easier.

    One thing I tried that works (for me) is to go to bed or do whatever I need to do to get better. I tell myself that I can either take this one day (or one week or however long it takes) to get better, or I can spend three times as long (or longer) getting over it, because I’m not looking after myself.

    I give myself permission to be sick. But I’ve been there too.

    • Exactly. Because so often, we’re treated like we’re not allowed to be sick. Especially here in the US, where paid sick days are fewer and fewer — and for freelancers, non-existent!

  2. PS Feel better soon!

  3. […] some of my workload. I talk about the guilt involved whenever I get sick on the January 21st Ink in My Coffee post, and how that doesn’t do anyone any […]


Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: